All of My Regrets are Nothing New
by GRACE5
Summary: Ziva and Tony end up in a difficult situation and they both have tough choices to make. TIVA. Tony's POV. Season 4 spun my way.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So this is my first attempt at Tony's POV, which the whole story will be in. I'm doing my best to keep it in character, but it's wicked hard! So constructive criticism is welcome, as always. And, unlike all my other stories I already have so future chapters written, I'm just reworking them trying to keep them in character. **

Chapter 1

"Wait, what are you saying?" I asked as I felt like the air was being sucked out of me.

"Tony, please, do not make this more difficult than it has to be." She practically pleaded with me as her eyes, glazed with tears, stared back at me.

"I'm not sure I'm understanding what you're saying." I say as I bite back the urge to scream at her. When she just stared back at me I shook my head trying to convince her to elaborate, when she didn't I decided I'd continue. "You're pregnant, you've known for three months and you're telling me not to worry about it?"

"Yes." She said simply and I felt my cheeks turn red with agitation and anger.

"Not worry about it, what does that even mean?" I asked and watched as she pulled the sleeves on her sweatshirt down and leaned back into the corner of the couch.

"Why can you not just walk away from this?" she hissed and I felt my jaw drop slightly.

"That's what you want? For me to just walk away?" I said trying my best to keep my emotions out of my voice as I scooted closer to her on the couch.

"I just want you to be happy." She said softly as she dropped my gaze and played with the hem of her sweatshirt, which was actually my sweatshirt. In any other situation I would be trying my hardest to remove it from her and having my way.

"What does that mean?" I asked and her glare immediately settled on me. "You want me to be happy, we were happy, Ziva." I reminded her as I scooted closer to her again.

"But we are not a we and you have a new girlfriend now." She said softly as she leaned into me. I was already hating this undercover assignment Jenny had me doing, now I was hating it even more.

"Ziva." I tried but she placed her hand on my chest and tried to push away from me but I instinctively wrapped my arms around her waist and held her close to me.

"Tony, please stop." She broke as she buried her face into my neck. I felt a few of her hot tears on my skin and I pulled her tighter against me. I had never seen Ziva David, Mossad assassin slash ninja, cry. I kissed the top of her head and that had some how brought her back to reality and she forcefully pulled away from me.

"What?" I asked as I lay back against the couch defeated.

"You should go." She told me as she wiped her eyes with the sleeves of her hoodie.

"No, we're not done talking." I argued and she shook her head at me. "Ziva, please."

"Please what?" she asked confused. "Just walk away, Tony. Go back to your life. We both agreed to act like this summer never happened."

"You're pregnant, Ziva." I told her roughly. "How can you expect me to forget and walk away?" I know I have a reputation of an asshole, but jeez I thought Ziva at least didn't think of me like that.

"Tony, just go back to your life. Forget tonight, forget this summer." She pleaded with me. I shook my head slightly, fighting off the urge to scream at her.

"I can't do that!" I growled and she looked at me surprised.

"Why, why are you having so much difficulty with this?" she asked frustrated as she clenched her fists.

"You're asking me to abandon you and our friggin' kid." I hissed. "That's difficult for me, sorry."

"Why?" she yelled. "You do not want a child." I opened my mouth to protest and ask how she knew what I wanted but she placed her finger over my lips and gave me a look that I knew meant shut up. "You are in a serious relationship for the first time, and you are happy, live that life."

"Live that life." I repeated quietly. What the hell did that mean? I dropped my head into my hands and sighed.

Why was I fighting this again? She was giving me a clean, easy way out, and she wanted me to take it. She knew I didn't want a kid, that the simple idea of being a father scared the shit out of me. Leaving Ziva alone with the baby while I went around and pretended to be a perfect boyfriend to some daughter of an arms dealer wasn't a life I wanted to live either. Wait, she never actually said she was keeping the baby, she just said she was pregnant.

"I am keeping it." She clarified and I looked up at her shocked. "You are very easy to read."

"Thanks?" I laughed nervously.

"Are you ready to go?" she asked with a yawn. I chose to ignore that comment and question her more.

"You been to the doctors yet?" I asked and her face softened.

"Yes." I waited for more but it never came. I didn't even have a movie I could reference this moment to.

"So that's it?" I asked. "You expect me to walk away and forget I knocked you up, and what are you gonna do?"

"Knocked me up?" was all she got out it, of course.

"Got pregnant." I clarified and she nodded. "Ziva, what do you plan on doing?"

"What do you mean?" she asked as her big brown eyes settled on mine and I couldn't help but wonder if our child would inherit those eyes, brown eyes were a dominate trait.

"You said you're keeping the baby, what's your plan?" I asked again and risked scooting closer to her.

"Tell everyone, deal with everyone. Tell my father, deal with my father." She laughed sarcastically. "Have the baby and play it by nose."

"Ear, it's play it by ear." I laughed as I tucked a stray curl behind her ear.

"Tony." She said seriously again as she pushed my hand away. Why is it that she can always remember I have a girlfriend but I can't? "Go, be happy."

"Stop telling me to be happy and live my life and that I don't want a baby." I exploded standing from the couch and looking down at her. "We. Were. Happy." I said as I pointed back and forth between us with each word. "If we weren't, you wouldn't be pregnant." She scoffed and looked away from me. "Okay?"

"Okay." She said and turned her head slightly looking at me like I was retarded. "Are you done now?"

"Yes." I nodded and sat on the coffee table across from her.

"What are you doing?" she asked with another yawn. I should really go and let her get to bed, but I know as soon as I walk out that door, this conversation will be over.

"We're still talking." I said bluntly, I was exhausted myself.

"No, Tony, you are talking. Talking in circles and it is starting to drive me balls."

"Nuts." I automatically corrected. "You were doing good there for awhile too."

"Shut up." She sulked as she crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"Ziva." I said and reached out and took her hands in mine and idly ran my thumb over her knuckles. "What do you want? What would make you happy?"

"You going back to being Tony, Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo." She smiled at me and I couldn't help but smile back. "I think a baby would suffocate you, I do not want that for you."

"What about you?" I asked softly not sure what to say to her last sentence. A screaming baby all through out the night, that would always need changing and feeding and attention wasn't something I would enjoy. "Why are you giving me an out?"

"Because you have one, Tony." She said as she took her hand from mine and placed it on my cheek. "Take it." She whispered softly.

"Do you want a baby, Ziva?" I asked as I leaned into her touch. "This baby?" My baby.

"Yes." She said barely above a whisper. "I enjoyed taking care of Tali, I just hope this time things will end up differently." She said as she looked away from me to a picture on her mantel. "I want something new, something completely innocent. Try and raise a child the right way, not as an assassin or cold hearted. I admit now is not the ideal time, but I do not know if I would ever have the opportunity and now that I do, I want to take it."

"Yeah." I agreed as I held her gaze. I fucking wanted that too, but not right now. Not with this undercover op. "When do you plan on telling Gibbs?"

"Tomorrow." She said obviously grateful that I changed the topic. God, when Gibbs finds out that I fathered Ziva's baby, I'm so dead. "I am just going to tell him it was a one night stand."

"You're going to lie to Gibbs?" I laughed and she glared at me. "Good luck."

"Gibbs hates getting into our personal lives, Tony." She laughed and yawned again.

"So, I guess that's it." I sighed. A heavy, miserable weight settling in my chest. "You want me to walk away?"

"Tony, we are not going through this again." She sighed. "Right now, do you want to be a father?"

"No." I said honestly, knowing she would know if I was lying any way. "But I don't want to be a douche bag either." I said running my hand through my hair trying to hide my nerves. "My father didn't even do that, he was at least there for me to hate on."

"Not the same thing." She said with another, loud yawn. "Tony, stop trying to fight it. Go home, call your girlfriend, get some sleep, I will see you tomorrow at work."

"What are you gonna tell your dad?" I asked as she stood and pulled me up by hand and led me to her door.

"Goodnight Tony." She laughed and leaned up and kissed my cheek.

"Almost got it." I laughed as I cupped her face and kissed her soundly. She resisted against me for a second but soon gave in and ran her tongue against my lips. I happily granted her access and pushed her back against the door. Ziva David was an amazing kisser, that was fact. I easily ran my hand under her sweatshirt and felt the small bumps, which sadly brought us back to reality.

"Tony." She said breathlessly as she pushed me away slightly.

"You have a bump." I said dumbly as I stared at her but didn't remove my hand from her warm skin.

"It is small." She said as she shivered under my gaze and I smirked, I loved getting reactions out of Ziva.

"It is." I agreed as I pushed her sweatshirt up and studied the tan, taunt skin. I hesitantly ran my hand over the warm skin as she stared at me. There was a baby in Ziva David's stomach, and I was the reason why. Pride settled over me. I got Ziva David pregnant, talk about an ego boost. This baby would be, literally, living proof of the summer we spent together.

"Tony?" she questioned softly and I dropped my hand and pulled her sweatshirt back down.

"I can't." I said shaking my head.

"You can't?" she repeated confused.

"I can't just leave."

"I am asking you to, Tony." Ouch. She said once again placing her hand on my cheek. "Go, forget this. You have your girlfriend now, maybe that will turn into something."

"But this turned into something." I whined and she laughed at me. "We're good together, Ziva."

"That is why we are such great partners." She said softly and dropped her hand from cheek.

"Yeah, I guess." I said finally accepting defeat. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight Tony." She said again. I nodded and kissed her cheek, refusing to realize I'd just walked away from the woman carrying my child, but she wanted me to.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay, so the only thing that I've taken from season 4 is that Gibbs had left and is now back and Director Shepard had given Tony the undercover mission with Jeanne. **

**I know Tony probably wouldn't leave Ziva like this but since he's been an ass on the show lately and I already have future chapters written he's gonna be a slight ass in my story also, no worries things will change. **

Chapter Two

I sat at my desk trying to busy myself with something as Ziva led Gibbs to the elevator so she could talk to him. I knew that meant that she was going to tell him she was pregnant. McGee sat at his desk confused and nervous.

"What do you think they're talking about?" McGee asked.

"Don't know Probie." I grumbled as I scrunched up a piece of paper and threw it at his head.

"You think she's being sent back to Israel?" McGee asked with wide eyes and a tight voice.

"What?" I asked, that thought hadn't even crossed my mind. I felt my stomach churn. "No, they can't do that."

"Sure they can." McGee said. "She is a liaison officer."

"McGee, stop." I ordered and he immediately closed his mouth as the elevator doors opened and Ziva stepped out ahead of Gibbs.

I eyed her closely. Her eyes were watery and her head was bowed, trying to hide the fact she was about to cry. Her hand lay protectively over where I knew her baby was. No, our baby. She sat at her desk quietly, purposely not looking at any one, especially me.

"You alright, Ziva?" McGee asked as he watched her.

"Fine, McGee." She said and he was rewarded with a smile.

"Go home." Gibbs said as he grabbed his things and shut his computer off and left, not even giving us a chance to say goodnight.

"Well." McGee said as he stood between my desk and Ziva's. "Night."

"Goodnight McGee." Ziva said and looked back to her computer.

"Later Probie." I said with a small smirk and waited for the elevator to close before I got up and sat on the corner of Ziva's desk. "What happened?"

"Nothing Tony." She said refusing to look at me.

"What'd he say, Ziva?" I asked softly.

"That he was beyond disappointed." She said softly, her voice breaking as she looked up at me. "I am not allowed in the field either."

"That's a given." I stated and her eyes narrowed at me. "Sorry."

"But he will not allow, this, to send me back to Israel." She said and I nodded, relieved to hear that she would remain at NCIS, at least for now.

"That's a good thing, Ziva." I said trying to get a smile out of her. "And you gotta remember he doesn't know the real story. I'll talk to him, tell him I'm the father. He can't hold this against you when he doesn't know the whole truth." I offered and she looked up at me with a watery gaze.

"No, he will murder you." She said with a slight shake to her head. I sighed and dropped my head into my hands. This was making me want to rip my hair out. I wanted to be with Ziva, but I don't want to fight or have to work this hard to stay close while she worked just as hard to push me away. "Tony, you cannot."

"Why? Are you ashamed-." I started but she cut me off before I could finish.

"No, Tony, and you know that." She stated firmly with serious chocolate eyes.

"Then why are you pushing me out of my baby's life, your life?" I asked my chest getting tight again, like every time I thought or talked about the baby. "You're not even giving me a chance, giving us a chance. We could be a family, Ziva." I said surprising myself then cursing myself for making her tear up again.

"Tony," she started and I knew from the tone of her voice she was rejecting me again.

"Don't even say it's because I have a new girlfriend." I warned because if this whole thing was about Jeanne and the fact we were "serious" I'd freak on Jenny so bad I'd probably end up getting fired. "Because if it is I'll end it, Zi."

"You said you do not want to be a father." Ziva said with a slight smile. "There's nothing wrong with that either, Tony. We did not plan on this."

"Yeah, maybe I don't want to be a father." I said getting frustrated and way to emotional. "But I am." I mumbled. "What about you?"

"What about me?" she laughed. "We did not plan this, but I want this. What I do not want to is to rope you down and have you turn around one day and hate me."

"I couldn't hate you." I grumbled as she stood from her chair and came to stand between my legs.

"You have your girlfriend and you are gradually learning to commit to that and be in that type of relationship." How the fuck did she know what I was learning? Maybe I was learning I hated living another life that she wasn't apart of. Maybe, that lately when I was up all nights thinking, I was learning I may want to be a father. "Do that, Tony. It could turn into something you had never expected. Maybe you will end up married and have kids then."

"No, that won't be happening." I laughed. "I could never have another kid and see them and not think of this kid. Our kid, that I left. You do realize Ziva you're bearing a DiNozzo."

"I know." She laughed as her eyes roamed over my face. "I'm hoping for a dark haired, green eyed baby."

"You're a sucker for my eyes, Ziva David." I laughed and I rested my hands on her hips.

"I am." She confirmed with a shy smile. She was about to saying something else when my cell rang.

"Sorry." I mumbled as I answered the phone.

"Goodnight." Ziva whispered as she gathered her things, kissed my cheek, and left for the night.

"What?" I asked Jeanne, not paying attention to a word she had said. "Tonight? Sure." I said as I turned and walked over to my desk, glancing up at the catwalk. "I'll bring dinner." I smiled and closed the phone.

I finished my report and shut down everything for the night, not sure if I wanted to go over to Jeanne's tonight. I knew she was getting impatient with the fact I was withholding sex, but she was going to have to deal. I am honestly scared to death of getting her pregnant. Even though Ziva and I weren't using condoms, and as cliché as it is, it's because we were too into each other to think about that. I don't have that problem with Jeanne, my thoughts usually end up on Ziva when Jeanne starts rambling any way about whatever.

Months went by and Ziva's baby bump was now really obvious. McGee and Abby had been told a few days after she told Gibbs. Abby of course went friggin' nuts and bounced all around, nearly hugged Ziva to death. McGee was funny, he didn't know what to say, so he said congratulations about 20 times. It bothered me that none of them questioned who the father was, or what I thought about the situation.

"Morning." Ziva smiled brightly, throwing us all off. Her eyes had a new sparkle to them and she seemed to be glowing. It was the first time I'd seen her genuinely happy in a long time, since the summer actually.

"Morning, how was your doctor's appointment?" McGee asked. How come McGoo knew she had a doctor's appointment and I didn't?

"Good." Ziva smiled as she booted up her computer.

"Find out the sex?" Gibbs asked as he looked from his screen over to Ziva.

"I did." Ziva smiled and butterflies started in my stomach. "Little boy."

"Congratulations." McGee smiled and Gibbs nodded with a smirk. "Got any names picked out?"

"Yes." Ziva said. I couldn't help but smile at Ziva's excitement. "Jason, Seth, and Daniel. I cannot decide."

When did she start thinking about names? I knew the baby would have her name, that wasn't a question. Jason David. Seth David. Daniel David. I didn't like any of them, but that didn't matter, not since I walked out on them.

"Come on McGee you're with me." Gibbs said as he pointed to McGee and they both disappeared behind the steal doors of the elevator.

"What do you think, Tony?" Ziva asked surprising me. We hadn't talked about anything besides work or how she was feeling since the night Gibbs had her on the brink of tears. "About the names, the truth."

"They're not my favorites." I said and she nodded. "I like Avery, or Wyatt, or Magnum." When the fuck did I start thinking about names?

"I am not naming him Magnum." She laughed. "Avery."

"Yeah." I said rubbing the back of my neck as I leaned back in my chair.

"What does it mean?"

"I have no clue, but I doubt it's Hebrew." I smirked as I watched her type on her keyboard.

"Elf Ruler." She laughed as she looked back up at me. "That's what it means."

"Well, maybe we should let McGee have that one." I joked.

"I like it." She said shyly. I stood from my chair walked over to her desk and sat in my usual spot on the corner.

"Avery David." I practiced. "I like it."

"Avery Matteo David." She elaborated and looked up at me for a reaction.

"Perfect." I smiled. Avery Matteo DiNozzo didn't sound too bad either. "Can you feel him move or anything yet?"

"All the time." Ziva said as she placed her hand on top of her protruding stomach, tempting me to touch it.

"Yeah?" I asked as I watched her get lost in her thoughts.

"Lately, when you talk he gets excited." She said softly and looked up at me after a second. God, was she trying to break me? "Or he'll decide he wants to continue playing football with my bladder."

"Soccer." I corrected. "You're in America, it's soccer."

"I know, Tony, I know how protective you are of your football." She laughed and took a drink from her water bottle. "Which does not make sense because you do not do anything with your feet."

"Give it up, Ziva." I laughed and she glared at me. "You're not gonna win this."

"I never win anything sports related with you." She laughed. "Well in a discussion, actually competing against you, I would kick your ass."

"Keep dreaming David." I smiled and she laughed looking away from me again.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So I would like everyone's opinion about the name Avery. It is a unisex name but I don't know any girl Averys, just boys so for me it fits. But if you have any other names in mind feel free suggest them. I am going to stick with a name that begins with 'A' though, defiantly. **

**WishYouWereHere15 mentioned that they were a little bit turned off by the name Avery (which I take no offence to) because I've read stories and been turned off by things like that too. I personally do like the name Avery for a boy, but if a significant amount of people don't I have no problem with changing it to Andrew or Alexander, but not Anthony. **

**Let me know…**

Chapter Three

"But I hate shopping." I whined as Jeanne dragged me into another little shop. "It's so boring."

"Oh hush, Tony." Jeanne laughed. "You love shopping."

"Sometimes." I grumbled as she disappeared into the back of the store. I glanced around the store and headed over to the small corner where college themed baby clothes hung. "Please have it." I said as I looked through all the tiny onesies.

"Something I can help you with?" an older gentleman asked me.

"Yeah, you have any Ohio State stuff?" I asked dropping my hands from the racks.

"I may have something." He said and moved to the next rack and pulled out a white onesie thing. "Ohio State University future freshman."

"Perfect." I said taking the item from him and examining it. "Thanks."

"Boy or girl?" he asked.

"Boy, future soccer star, the way I'm hearing it." I laughed. The amount of times Ziva made a trip to the bathroom was ridiculous, she of course blamed the baby for playing or bouncing on her bladder.

"Ah, so how much longer?" he smiled at me as we walked to the register.

"2 more months." I said as I looked around for Jeanne.

"Got a name picked out?" an older woman came up standing next the man.

"Avery Matteo." I said taking out my wallet.

"Aw, that's adorable." She smiled at me and placed the outfit in a bag for me. 30 bucks? That little amount of fabric cost 30 bucks? How the hell was Ziva affording all this?

"Ready?" Jeanne asked as she wrapped her arms around my arm and the older couple glanced at her surprised.

"Yeah." I smiled at the completely confused and probably disgusted couple. "Thanks."

"Have a good day." The older woman called to me.

"What'd you get?" Jeanne asked as she peaking into my bag.

"My friend's having a baby, so I got her something." I said not really wanting to discuss Ziva with Jeanne. I needed to keep them separate.

"You picked out baby clothes?" she asked completely shocked as she took the bag from my hand and pulled the onesie out. "Cute." She smiled as she examined it then placed it back in the bag.

"Thanks." I smiled as she handed the bag back and we continued to walk towards her place.

"You know, Tony." She started after a couple minutes of silence. "I've been thinking."

"That's not good." I joked and she swatted my arm.

"Any way, we've been together for a while." She started and I inwardly groaned, this wasn't going to be good. "I'm on the pill." Oh, hell no.

"Listen Jeanne." I said as I stopped and turned her towards me. "I can't do that." I said and she looked at me confused. "The last woman I was with," I paused to think of the right words. "Like that, she got pregnant." Not to mention, it was Ziva! I always wear a condom, always. Regardless of the girl, except Ziva.

Ziva, Ziva, Ziva. I'm spending the day with my fake girlfriend living my fake life and all I can think about is my real ex-girlfriend and my real son. Avery Matteo David, son of Officer Ziva David and Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo.

But sex with Ziva, god, it was the best thing ever. Always intense and most of the time hot, hard, loud, and a constant battle of domination. Except the times it was slow, soft, loving, with a lot of kissing and caressing, like we were hopelessly in love. Maybe we were, maybe we are. No, we aren't because if we were I'd be at home with her right now, talking to her stomach so Avery would know my voice and who I was.

"You're a father?" she asked horrified. She obviously thought I was lost in my thoughts about my child and not about sex with my partner, from my real life.

"No." I said shaking my head, and continuing to walk. It was kinda true, but I wasn't a father by choice, I was told to walk away and I did. She wanted me to and a part of me wanted to too, but now I was starting to wonder where that part was. "Lost him."

"Oh god, Tony, I'm sorry."

"It's fine." I shrugged and continued walking.

"Why'd you break up?" she asked as she fell in step next to me.

"We didn't work." I mumbled Ziva's reason, well what she claimed was the reason why we couldn't be together once Gibbs returned. Then she ended up pregnant and she decided I wouldn't work out as a father either.

"Tony?" I heard Jeanne question as she looked at me concerned.

"What?" I asked as I pushed her up against the door to her apartment and kissed her. I was done with this conversation and it was soon forgotten.

I stood and stared at Ziva's door, the bag containing the Ohio State onesie in my hand. I was dying to give it to Ziva, her reaction was gonna be priceless. I just didn't want her to open the door and see me on the other side then tell me to go away and move on. "Fuck it." I said and knocked on the door.

"Tony?" Ziva questioned as she pulled the door open.

"Hey." I said as I took in her attire. My old grey Ohio State t-shirt, a pair of baggy pajama bottoms, and those fuzzy socks she loves so much. "I brought you a gift." I forced a smile and she did too as she stepped aside to let me into her apartment.

"So what'd you bring?" she asked with a yawn and I glanced at my watch figuring I must've woken her up.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled as I followed her to the couch and sat down next to her. She looked at me confused and I smirked.

"What for?" Ziva asked as she covered a yawn with her hand.

"Waking you up." I said simply and placed the bag in front of her on the coffee table.

"It is fine, Tony." She smiled and glanced at the bag then back at me, she was too shy to just take it and open it and it was cute. Ziva David was cute, she just didn't like to show it.

"Open it." I encouraged with a smile, butterflies in my stomach.

I watched as she hesitantly pushed the tissue paper aside that the nice couple from the store had placed in there for me. She pulled the outfit out by the hanger and examined it closely. She couldn't even fight back the smile that took over her face as she ran her finger over the writing.

"It's wonderful, Tony." She smiled as she set it on her lap and turned to smile at me. "Thank you."

"Welcome." I smiled and thought carefully on how to approach the topic of money, and how much kids cost. "Ziva, that little piece of clothe with little writing on it cost like 30 bucks."

"I can pay you back." She started seriously and looked down at the onesie, my heart dropped and I was filled with anger at the same time, why did this woman think I was such a jackass?

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all." I sighed as I continued to hold my gaze on her. She was so different outside of work and I'm used to that, I liked that, that was my favorite Ziva. She fit perfectly against my side, just like her hand fit perfectly in mine, just like I fit perfectly inside…

"What are you saying?" she asked confused pulling me out of my trance. What was I saying? Right, babies are expensive.

"I want to help you, with the money and everything." I said and she looked utterly confused. "Please, don't fight, we have the same job. Well almost the same job. I want to do something for him, even if it is just buying him stuff."

"Well I have almost everything." Ziva said as she dropped her gaze to the onesie, smiling again. "Gibbs was actually smiling when he offered to make the crib. He had so much fun with that he made a changing table and rocker."

"Gibbs made you all that?" I asked shocked.

"And Abby and Tim painted the walls." She said with a smile as she stood from the couch and took my hand leading me down the hallway to where her guest bedroom was.

"Abby and Tim painted the walls and you let them?" I laughed as we stood outside the closed door. "What's on them? Math equations, skulls, and chemical formulas?"

"There's a periodic table also." She laughed and I was honestly horrified. "I figured with your genes he will need all the help he could get."

"I have good genes." I defended as she opened the door and we walked inside.

The crib was beautifully crafted and against the wall opposite the door. The rocking chair and changing table matched the crib. But the walls! The walls were awesome. They were a soft blue with sports balls scattered all around the wall left of the crib. Basketballs, soccer balls, footballs, baseballs, tennis balls, even hockey pucks. A basketball rug lay in front of the crib. There were various sports team flags on the other wall, the walls with the shelves and pictures on the shelves. There was a sports border going around the top of the walls also.

"Ziva." I said in awe as I walked over to the shelves to examine the pictures. "This is awesome. I'm jealous, my room wasn't this cool."

"I am glad you like." She smiled as she leaned against the doorframe and watched me. "Only two more months."

"Excited?" I smiled as I set the photo of the team back on the shelf, my favorite photo of us, Ziva and I were in the middle and my arms were wrapped around her waist as I tickled her and she squirmed.

"Yes." She said with a huge smile as she stepped towards me. "I cannot wait." She said and moved her hand over her stomach, rubbing it softly.

"Is he moving?" I asked, hesitant to just reach out and touch her. She wasn't mine to touch any more, and she hadn't been for a long time.

"Yes." She said and reached out her hand and took mine and laid it over her stomach where I could feel him kicking beneath her warm skin.

"Wow." I said and spread my fingers over of the bump. "Strong."

"Yeah." She laughed and placed her hand over mine. I could feel her eyes on me but I wasn't going to look at her. I haven't been this close to crying in a long time, and I didn't even fucking know why I had the urge to cry. "I'm thinking hockey player, I like hockey players."

"Hockey?" I questioned and left my hand on her stomach even though the kicking had stopped. "No, basketball and football. Maybe baseball."

"We will let Avery decide." She laughed and yawned again.

"Ziva." I started and I could tell by her eye roll she knew what was coming.

"Stop Tony." She said softly and placed her hand on my cheek.

"No, Ziva, No. I can't keep turning my back. I don't want to." I admitted and she looked at me surprised and she cocked her head slightly waiting for me to continue.

"Tony, I don't want to pass a baby back and forth between us either, like a hot yam." She said seriously.

"Hot potato, Zee-vah." I laughed. "And I don't want that either."

"What do you want then, Tony, because you are confusing me."

"I'll come over and take care of him, you know give you a chance to sleep." I said nervously afraid of being rejected. "I don't want to be Albert I want to be James, and I don't want Avery calling some other dude Daddy."

"Who are Albert and James?" she asked concerned and I laughed.

"Look Who's Talking, it's a movie, we'll watch it later." I said, my frustration coming back because she ignored the fact I admitted I wanted to be the one that would be called Daddy. Why did this have to be so hard? Having a baby shouldn't necessarily be easy, but this part shouldn't be hard.

"What about your girlfriend?" she asked and I clenched my jaw.

"Avery, this is about Avery. Us and Avery, not her." I growled. "Forget her. Just say you'll let me help, you'll let me be in his life because I swear Ziva, I really do want to. I've spent a lot of time thinking about it. I understand that you don't want to be with me and this isn't about that."

"Okay, Tony." She said as she cupped my cheek. I love her touch, even when it's accidental; it always calms me but at the same time sends tingles all through my body. "You can sit on the baby." She said with another yawn.

"You should get some sleep." I said not bothering to correct her as I placed my hand over top of hers and brought it to my mouth and placed a kiss to her palm.

"Yes." She smiled as I dropped her hand and followed her out of the nursery.

"Goodnight Ziva." I said as she opened the door and I turned back to her. I wanted to kneel and say goodnight to my son and maybe even kiss her stomach, that's what dads are supposed to do right? But I didn't because I didn't want to look stupid, so instead I just stood there and looked at her stomach.

"Night Tony." She laughed. "See you in work tomorrow."

"Yeah, tomorrow." I nodded and turned and walked away from her again.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

"Took you long enough, DiNozzo." I heard Gibbs say as I climbed down his basement stairs.

"What do you mean, Boss?" I asked as I sat at the bottom of the stairs and watched him as he sanded his boat, his back turned to me.

"Don't be a dumbass." He said not bothering to look at me. "And I'm not a dumbass either, DiNozzo."

"So you know." I sighed. Why did he always have to know everything? He didn't respond but instead kept working on that damned boat. "She tell you?"

"Nope." He said and finally turned to me. "She's your partner, she had your back."

"This isn't about work or us being partners." I hissed and he just raised his eyebrows at me.

"Sure it is." He laughed. He fucking laughed. "Because if she wasn't your partner and just some random girl you met at a bar, you'd be running around right now trying to find pickles, grapes, and meatloaf. But she knows you, better than you probably know yourself. She wants you to be happy and that's why she's not pushing you into anything." He stared at me obviously waiting for some type of response, but all I could think of was that I had never heard Gibbs speak that much at one time in my life. "What?"

"Never heard you say that much." I said as I thought about his words. "But I'm not happy, she thought that walking away would make me happy-."

"So did you." He interrupted and I choose to ignore him.

"But I'm not, not like I used to be." I said as I dropped my gaze to my feet. My life is a mess, and I hate it. All I want is that summer back, when everything was in place and I was happy without having to try to be.

"You're not a jackass, Tony. You can act like it, that is for damn sure, but you're not." He said and I looked up at him confused. "If it's what you wanted and she's okay with it, why is it bothering you so much?"

"Because not all of me wanted it." I grumbled and ran my hand through my hair.

"How'd you get yourself into this?" he asked shaking his head and he started sanding again.

"What do you mean?" I asked as I watched him. "Because Boss if you don't know where babies come from-."

"I know, and I wanna know why you were making babies with Ziva, your coworker." He said evenly.

"It wasn't a one time thing, I wouldn't do something like that to her." I started and he turned to look at me.

"No, you just get her pregnant and leave." Ouch, but it was true and I deserved it. I actually deserved a lot worse.

"We didn't just jump into bed. I took her out to dinner, we went to the movies, took her to see a baseball game too." I started with a smile as I remembered sitting at the Nationals game explaining the game of baseball to Ziva and watched as she got excited when the other team, the Red Sox, did well. I reminded her that she was in D.C. and she should root for the Nationals. She looked at me confused and asked why she would root for a bad team? I didn't have an answer so I just laughed and let her crush on Jacoby Ellsbury.

"And?" Gibbs asked obviously annoyed by my pause.

"And we spent the summer together. You came back with your Rule 12. We decided it would be best to split, well she decided and I agreed." I said and wondered when I had become whipped. She said we should break up and I agreed, she said I should walk away from my son and I agreed.

"There a reason you don't fight for anything any more?" he asked as he leaned against his boat and stared at me with disapproving eyes.

"It's what she wanted." I tried to defend, but it was just another pathetic excuse. "I just want her to be happy."

"And she is happy," Gibbs said. "that baby makes her happy and he's not even born yet, you gave her that."

"Yeah." I nodded and looked away from him again. "I saw what you did for the nursery the other day, it's beautiful Boss." I said and looked up to see him smiling at me.

"She still wouldn't give you up then either." Gibbs said shaking his head with a smile. "Threatened to kick her ass back to Tel Aviv and everything, but she kept her mouth shut, wanted to protect you."

"I don't get it." I sighed and leaned back against the steps. "She should want me dead, she should have killed me a long time ago." Sometimes I wish she had.

"She loves you, DiNozzo, and that's the only reason I haven't killed you yet." He said and held his blue glare on me. "That's why she's pushing you away. You hurt her once DiNozzo, no way is she gonna let you do it again. No way is she going to let you hurt her child either."

"She left me!" I yelled and he just stared at me.

"And you turned right around and jumped into another relationship!" he yelled back.

"It's an assignment!" I said matching his volume.

"She know that?"

"No." I muttered and hung my head. "I'm not walking away anymore though. Once he's born I'll go over and stay while she sleeps and stuff."

"Right, when you're not undercover." He said and I felt my jaw drop. "Jenny's a lot easier to break than Ziva." He said and took a step towards, a new anger in his eyes. "What the fuck are you doing playing with another woman while Ziva's alone, pregnant with your kid?" Whoa, finally. I needed him to yell at me, someone to yell at me and hit me. Punish me for being such an ass. I sat there silent and he just continued to glare at me. "You love her?"

"What?" I asked completely taken aback, that and I didn't know which her he was talking about.

"Do you love Ziva or The Frog's doctor daughter?" he asked in a tone that told me he was about ready to flip shit. "It's a simple question, one word answer."

"Ziva." I said quickly. I didn't have to think about it, Ziva would always be _that_ girl. I guess I'm in love with Ziva, it's not like I know what it's like to be in love with someone. But what I feel for Ziva is different than anything I've ever felt for anyone.

"Jesus Tony." He sighed and turned to his workbench and poured himself a glass of bourbon.

"I know." I sighed. "Everything's fucked up." He didn't comment but just gave a me look. "When did you know you wanted to be a father?" He didn't say anything for a moment, but I could tell he was thinking about it.

"Day she was born." He said with a slight smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "First time I heard her cry, you never want to hear or see your child cry." I was about to say something but he beat me to it. "I thought I wanted to be one before she was born, but when she was born I knew."

"Oh." Was all I could think of to say. I watched as he took a sip of his drink and shook my head. "I don't know how to get myself out of this." I said softly. "This mission, things with Ziva."

"You chose your job over your family, DiNozzo." He said simply with a shrug. "You have a long road ahead of you, if you choose to be with Ziva full time."

"Am I allowed?" I asked sounding much like a scared kindergartner that knew what was ahead could quite possibly be a trap.

"DiNozzo. You and David blew rule 12 to shit, so I would say you might as well ignore it." He laughed taking another swig of his drink. "But you're already pretty deep into the undercover op."

"I know." I groaned as I placed my hands over my face, trying not to scream. "Jenny says it's supposed to help my career."

"That's not a bad thing." Gibbs said and I just looked at him.

"Leaving Ziva and my son for an undercover op and letting her think I've got some girlfriend that I'm crazy about is bad." I yelled as I stood. "It's really bad."

"So what are you going to do about?" Gibbs asked as he stepped closer to me.

"I don't know." I sighed. "This isn't a movie Gibbs, as much as I want it to be, I can't rewind and start over again." When I looked at him he was smiling at me, a real legit smile. "What?"

"Nice to see you're finally starting to grow up." He said and turned back to the boat.

"Well?"

"Well what?" he asked.

"What do I do, how do I get out of this?" I asked, almost whined, but Anthony DiNozzo didn't whine. "What would you do?"

"I dunno DiNozzo." He said glancing back to me. For once I wish he would just tell me what to do and not make me think about it.

"I can't bail on this op." I mumbled.

"I know, no way she'd let you either." Gibbs said as I moved to stand against the wall.

"How is this supposed to end?" I asked leaning my head back against the wall. "With The Frog killing me?"

"Dunno, DiNozzo." He shrugged. He should know these things. Damn him. "You tell your girlfriend you're about to have a kid?"

"No. I told her my last girlfriend was pregnant and we lost him." I said and waited for Gibbs' response. "That was probably a bad idea."

"Oh yeah." He said pouring more bourbon into his jar.

"I want out of this." I complained and he glared at me.

"So you want to be a father now?" he asked as he looked at me over his glass.

"What I want is to be there, with Ziva." I admitted as I watched him closely.

"That's not gonna happen, DiNozzo." He said. "Not any time soon."

"Why? Why the fuck not?"

"What do you think is gonna happen, Tony?" He laughed sarcastically at me. "You explain how your doctor girlfriend was just a mission and that you really want to be with her and Avery?"

"Yeah, something like that." I mumbled as I rubbed the back of my neck.

"And you think that she's just going to take you back? Do you know Ziva?"

"I thought I did!" I yelled. "The Ziva I knew wouldn't have just let me walk away, she wouldn't have pushed me away! She would have told me to man up, of course after she beat the shit out of me for getting her pregnant." I said and lowered my voice. "And if I had tried to walk away, she would've killed me. I don't know who _this_ Ziva is."

"Yeah." Gibbs nodded as he took some of his drink.

"He's gonna be here soon." I said dumbly as I stared at my hands.

"Yeah, only a couple more weeks."

"I don't know what to do." I repeated after a long pause. "If I ditch this mission, Ziva won't take me back, and I'll still only be visiting Avery. If I stick with the mission, with Jeanne, I'll still only be visiting Avery."

"It's up to you, DiNozzo."

"Why can't you just tell me what to do, tell me what the right thing is." I pleaded.

"It's your life, it's your decision." He said calmly.

"What does it matter? I don't get to be with Ziva." I said agitated as I threw my hands in the air. "I fucked that up pretty good. I'll only get to visit my son."

"You should be grateful you get to see him with the stunt you have going on."

"She left me." I reminded him. "If we were together and she found out she was pregnant, it wouldn't be like this."

"Maybe." He shrugged and set the jar on the bench and looked at me.

"I'll just leave things the way they are." I sighed running my hands through my now matted hair. "I don't want to stress her out."

"Her who, DiNozzo, Jenny, Jeanne, or Ziva?"

"Ziva." I said as I headed back up the stairs.

"DiNozzo." I heard him call and I turned back around to look at him. "You better cut this shit out with Ziva and Jeanne after your son's born. It's time you fight for something. Your career or Ziva and Avery."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: ** **I forgot to put in the last chapter that it was not the registered author WishYouWereHere15 that left the review I mentioned in Chapter 3 but an anonymous reviewer who left that review using that penname.**

Chapter 5

"You okay, Tony?" McGee asked me as I sat and stared at my computer screen.

"Fine, McGoo." I muttered and glanced over to Gibbs desk, where he worked silently. Then I looked at Ziva's desk, it was empty of course, like it had been the past two weeks.

"Okay." McGee said and turned back to his work.

"DiNozzo." I grumbled into my cell phone, not bothering to check the called I.D.

"Hi Tony." Ziva said with a tight voice and my heart sank.

"What's wrong?" I asked quickly and I heard her laugh on the other end of the line.

"Avery should be here soon." She said and obviously tried to hold back from yelling in the phone. "You said you wanted to be here."

"I do, where are you?" I asked as I gathered my coat and started to shut down my computer.

"Bethesda." She said with a grunt.

"I'll be there soon." I said and snapped my phone shut and stood from my desk and looked at Gibbs who gave me a knowing nod while McGee sat there confused as hell.

"Where's he going?" I heard McGee ask as I jumped into the elevator.

"Jeanne, hey listen." I started as I jumped into my car and sped off towards Bethesda, terrified of missing it. I'm almost positive that if I missed Avery's birth any chance I'd have with Ziva would be shot to hell. "I can't make it tonight." I said not paying attention to what she was saying but on the road making sure I didn't get myself killed. "I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you." We said our goodbyes and I threw _that_ cell phone on the passenger seat and drove even faster to the hospital.

"Hi." An older woman behind the lobby desk greeted as I walked into the hospital.

"Hi. I'm looking for Ziva David's room." I said and checked my cell phone for the millionth time to see if she called again.

"3rd floor, room 310." She smiled and pointed in the direction of the elevators.

"Thanks." I said as I opted for the stairs instead of waiting for the ridiculously slow elevators.

"How much longer?" I heard Ziva practically whine to the nurse as she looked over their heart rates.

"I'll get the doctor to come in and talk to you." The nurse said and smiled at Ziva and brushed by me as I pulled a chair up to Ziva's side.

"Hey." I smiled and she glared at me. "What?"

"I hate you, Anthony DiNozzo." She hissed through her clenched jaw. I smiled and held out my hand to her. She looked at me with a brilliant smile and took my hand and squeezed the shit out of it.

"Jesus Christ Ziva." I yelped as she let up a little and just smirked at me.

"I told you I hated you." She said as she took a deep breath and relaxed back into her pillow and turned to look at me.

"So that means you wanna shatter all the bones in my hand?" I asked still not letting go of her hand even though I knew another contraction would hit soon.

"You'll be lucky if that's all I break." She smiled and gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

"Hello Ziva." a doctor said with a smile as he came in and immediately walked over to where all the machines were.

"Your doctors a dude?" I whispered into her ear not even trying to hide my possessiveness.

"Yes, Tony." She laughed as another contraction hit.

"Okay Ziva." This doctor said as her contraction passed. "Your son's heart rate is still very low, I think it's time to do a C-section."

"What's wrong?" I asked confused.

"The cord's wrapped around his neck." The doctor. "I think 18 hours of labor is enough, don't you Ziva?"

"More than enough." Ziva grunted as she attempted to break my bones again.

"You've been here for 18 hours?" I asked turning back to her. "Why didn't you call me?"

"No reason we should both sit here like fruit." She smiled as she wiped hair off her damp forehead.

"Vegetables." I corrected and she squeezed my hand again. "Sorry."

"I'll go prep now, and a nurse will come with a consent form and to prep you." The doctor said with a smile and left.

I could hear my heartbeat in my ears as I stood next to Ziva's side, in these ugly scrubs, watching as the doctor started making incisions. Ziva's hand was still tight in mine as she watched me. Thankfully she'd had an epidural that had taken effect pretty quickly. As the doctor started cutting deeper I returned my attention to Ziva.

"You are not going to faint are you?" she asked as her chocolate pools bored into mine.

"No." I laughed and kissed the tip of her nose and ran my hand through her sweaty hair. "I'm not gonna faint."

"Okay, here we go." The doctor said and the anesthesiologist dropped the curtain so we could watch as our son was plucked from Ziva's womb. Sure enough the cord was wrapped around his tiny neck, but what scared me was the slight blue tint to his skin and the silence in the room. He wasn't crying.

"Tony." I heard Ziva plea as she tugged on my arm and I watched as Avery was placed in a warmer and a team of nurses and doctors swarmed around him. "Tony, why isn't he crying?" I heard her voice break.

"I don't know." I said my own voice cracking as I turned back to Ziva and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She somehow managed to wrap and arm around my neck and cried into my shoulder as I turned my head back to see the doctor with some type of mask over Avery's small face.

"Tony." She whimpered at the same time a wail erupted from Avery.

"Oh God." I sighed in relief as Avery continued to scream and Ziva cried harder.

"Just being a little dramatic." One of the nurses said as she wrapped my son up like he was some type of burrito and placed a blue cap on his head.

"Wonder where he gets that from." I whispered in Ziva's ear as the doctors continued to stitch her back up.

"You." Was her simple answer with a watery smile. I smirked and watched as the nurses re-suctioned his nose and mouth.

"Maybe." I said and placed random kisses on her cheek, nose, and forehead.

"Okay Dad, you want to hold him?" a nurse asked as she approached me with Avery still screaming in her arms.

"Yeah." I said as she handed Avery over to me and adjusted the cap on his head.

Truth is there is such thing as an ugly baby. Not my baby though. Avery was gorgeous. He had a head full of black hair, identical to Ziva's, that was hidden beneath the cap. Everything else was so tiny. Tiny nose, tiny mouth, tiny ears. His cries finally settled as I ran my finger down his cheek and murmured Italian to him. He yawned and my heart melted as I watched his tiny mouth close.

"Tony, would you like to share?" I heard Ziva ask. I looked to her with a smile as she wiped stray tears from her eyes.

"You carried him the last nine months, it's my turn." I pouted and the nurses laughed.

"DiNozzo, let me see my baby." Ziva laughed with a mock glare as I stepped closer and brought Avery close to her. She leaned up slightly and placed a kiss to his cheeks and forehead. "He's beautiful." She said as she laid back down and just gazed at him.

"He's handsome, DiNozzo men aren't beautiful, we're handsome." I laughed as she rubbed her nose against Avery's.

"No one said anything about you, Tony." She joked as we both watched the nurse take Avery to be weighed, measured, and to run more tests. Crying immediately filled the room again.

"Shush." I laughed and kissed her forehead again as I pushed her hair off her face.

"What?" she asked seriously as I gazed at her.

"You're beautiful." I said easily and left me hand on her cheek, gently running my thumb over the smooth skin. I wanted to tell her I loved her but refrained because I knew that would ruin this moment and that was the last thing I wanted to do. So for some reason I figured kissing her would be the better way to go.

"Tony?" she whispered before I softly ran my lips over hers. She immediately responded as I deepened and I slipped my hand on her cheek back into her hair. Her tongue found mine easily and battled until air became essential again. "Tony?"

"Don't." I said and pecked her lips again before glancing to her doctor who was watching us. I smirked at him and kissed Ziva quickly then tried to figure out where they took our son.

"He's in recovery, which is where we're going to take Ms. David." The doctor said with narrowed eyes.

"Once you're done of course." An older nurse smiled at me, causing both Ziva and I to blush.

We were only in recovery for an hour so before they moved us back into Ziva's room. The pediatrician assured us that Avery was fine and there was no permanent damage from his lack of breathing when he was born.

"Where is he? I want to see him." I heard Abby squeal from down the hallway. "There you are!"

"Hello Abby." Ziva laughed with a wince as she burped Avery and settled him back in her arms.

"How'd you get here so quick?" McGee asked me as he eyed me suspiciously. "And why are you in bed with Ziva?"

"We'll deal with that later." Abby said as she bounced next to Ziva's bed. "Can I hold him?"

"Of course." Ziva said as she handed Avery over to Abby.

"Oh, he's so cute!" Abby squealed startling him and he started to whimper.

"Shhh Abby, you'll make him cry." McGee said as he peered over Abby's shoulder at Avery.

"Hey Boss." I said as Gibbs entered the small room.

"Hey, how you feelin' Ziver?" he asked as he came and placed a kiss to her forehead.

"Good." She smiled and Gibbs just stared her down. "A little sore."

"Gibbs, look how cute he is." Abby said as she turned to Gibbs and adjusted Avery, who was starting to fuss in her arms.

"Check out the hair." McGee said with a smile and Abby glared at him.

"Do not make fun of him." Abby scolded and Avery started crying again. "Oh no, look what you did McGee."

"Give him to DiNozzo." Gibbs instructed Abby who looked at him confused.

"Tony?" Abby asked confused as she stepped towards me and placed Avery in my arms.

"Thanks." I smiled as I settled Avery and gently rocked him like the nurse taught me. Ziva leaned closer to me and watched as Avery's cries turned into whimpers and he was soon asleep.

"Not fair." Abby pouted and Gibbs and McGee smiled.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"Does that hurt?" I asked as I watched Avery suckle at Ziva's breast then quickly turned my attention back to the Ohio State pacifier that was in my hand. I felt guilty for staring at Ziva's boob, even if it's where my son was currently feeding.

"Are you serious, Tony?" she asked as she moved her eyes from Avery to me.

"Well, yeah, I mean it doesn't look like it tickles." I laughed and Avery stopped nursing.

"No, I mean about being a father." She said as she expertly burped Avery.

"Dead serious." I said without hesitation as I sat back on the edge of the bed and placed my arm behind Ziva. "Why?"

"We still have to fill the birth certificate out." Ziva said softly as she stroked Avery's cheek.

"Yeah." I said as I placed the pacifier back in Avery's mouth and stroked his thin black hair. I could feel Ziva's tension but didn't want to push her.

"I do not know if I want to give him your last name." she said softly as she leaned into me. I smiled and wrapped my arms around her shoulders and kissed her hair. "Do you have any thoughts?"

"I have a lot of thoughts." I smiled enjoying the feeling of her against my side.

"Tony." She laughed slightly.

"I always figured he would have your last name." I said and watched as Avery lay in Ziva's arms, content to just suck his pacifier. "But if you want to give him my name I'm more than fine with that." I could still feel her tension and pulled her closer against me. "I'm not going anywhere, Zi, I swear."

"Avery Matteo David or Avery Matteo DiNozzo?" she thought aloud.

"That reminds me, I have something for you." I said as I carefully got off the bed and grabbed my backpack.

"More Ohio State apparel?" she asked as she ran her finger over Avery's pacifier.

"No, I think he has enough for now." I laughed as I pulled the soft blue blanket out from my bag and sat back on the bed. "Here." I said nervously as I placed the soft blue clothe in Ziva's lap slightly over Avery.

"Where did get this?" she asked as she handed Avery to me and examined the blanket.

"It was mine." I said as Avery snuggled closer against my chest. "My father packed up all my shit and gave it to me a few years back, I remembered I had it a couple weeks ago."

"This was yours?" she asked slightly shocked.

"Yup, my grandmother embroidered my initials in the corner." I smiled as she searched for the corner and ran her finger over the 'A' and the 'D'.

"It's beautiful Tony." She smiled at me and leaned over to kiss my cheek.

"Thanks." I mumbled as I watched Avery. His whole body suddenly twitched as he hiccupped. I expected him to start crying because even I was startled by the movement and sound but he lay there content. His pacifier had fallen out of his mouth but he didn't seem to miss it.

"He did that all the time when I was pregnant." Ziva laughed as she leaned her head against my shoulder and we both watched Avery as he continued to hiccup.

"You could feel it?" I asked as I leaned my head on top of hers.

"Oh yeah." She laughed with a yawn as she reached out and placed her finger in Avery's palm and he wrapped his tiny fingers around hers.

"We make a cute kid." I smiled as I turned and kissed her hair and laid my head on top of hers.

"We really do." She said softly as she nuzzled her head against me.

"What color do you think his eyes will be?" I asked against her hair as Avery's hiccups finally settled.

"Like yours." She said as she ran her finger over Avery's eyebrow and he nuzzled further into my chest away from her hand.

"Mr. DiNozzo, visiting hours are over." A nurse said and I scowled at her. "Hospital policy, so don't give me that look."

"I wasn't giving you a look." I said and made no attempt to get up from my comfortable position on the bed with Ziva snuggled against my side and Avery finally in my arms.

"Yes you were." She laughed. "You can come back and visit your wife and son tomorrow, right now you need to leave so they can sleep."

"You're sure?" I smirked not bothering to correct the nurse even though I felt Ziva tense when she was called my wife.

"Oh, I'm sure." She laughed and turned and walked out of the room. "I'll be back in five minutes, you better be gone."

"Someone's cranky." I laughed as Ziva pulled away from me and leaned back against the pillows. I stood from the bed careful not to startle Avery. "I'm gonna put him in this crib thing, you should get some sleep."

"Okay." She said with a large yawn. I smiled as I watched her yawn dramatically, she closed her mouth and looked at me shyly. "What?"

"You're beautiful." I said seriously as I held my gaze on her enjoying the way she blushed.

"Please, I am a mess." She laughed.

"Mr. DiNozzo." The mean nursed warned as she walked by and still saw me in the room.

"I'm going." I whined and Ziva smirked at me. "She's mean."

"Heard that." I heard the nurse call as she returned to the nurses' station.

"I do not think she likes you, Tony."

"She's just jealous." I smirked and brought Avery up so his face was inches from mine. I could feel Ziva's gaze on me as kissed Avery's nose and forehead before placing him in his hospital crib. "I'll be back tomorrow." I said as I cupped her cheek and kissed her forehead. "When can you go home?"

"Tomorrow or the next day." She said as I left my hand on her cheek.

"I'll take you home." I offered and sat on the edge of the bed again. "Then maybe we could talk?"

"Talk?" she asked confused. "About what?"

"Later." I said and kissed her nose. "Get some sleep."

"Goodnight, Tony." She smiled as she took my hand and squeezed it.

"Night." I said giving her a gentle squeeze back as I stood from the bed and leaned over Avery's crib again and kissed his forehead. "Goodnight Avery."

"Mr. DiNozzo." That mean nurse called again like I was kindergartener.

"I'm going." I grumbled. "See you tomorrow."

**A/N: I know it's short and nothing happened but I had to put something up. I don't know if father's are aloud to stay overnight, so I just made it up. **


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"DiNozzo." Gibbs greeted, if you call that a greeting.

"Hey Boss." I said as I watched him work on his boat and leaned up against his workbench. "Whatcha doing?" I laughed as he just shook his head and glared at me.

"Why aren't you with Ziva?"

"Abby kicked me out." I said crossing my arms over my chest. "Think she figured it out?"

"DiNozzo." Gibbs started with a small chuckle. "We all know, they just don't know who else knows."

"Seriously, even McGoo? How'd they find out?" I didn't get an answer but a typical Gibbs look instead. "So that's why Abby's been weird with me."

"Well yeah, DiNozzo, remember Ziva told her it was a one night stand." Gibbs said and turned back to his boat.

"Oh yeah." I mumbled and ran my hand over my face frustrated.

"Did you need something?" he asked his back towards me.

"Help." I sighed and he turned and looked at me curiously and expectantly.

"With?" Gibbs pushed on as he took a threatening step towards me.

"Telling Jen, Director Shepard I want out of this." I said seriously as I met his eyes.

"There's no technique, Tony." He said with a small smile. I wondered if there was a way to get Gibbs to tell her for me. "Did you break up with the girl yet?"

"No, I think she knows something's up. I canceled on her the last couple nights to be with Ziva and Avery." I said. "You think her father's gonna kill me?"

"Don't know." He shrugged. "How are Ziva and the baby?"

"Good." I smiled enjoying the change of subject. "Ziva's still sore from the c-section and Avery's great, really calm."

"You're staying with them?" Gibbs asked eyeing me.

"Yup, couch is all mine." I laughed with fake enthusiasm. I'd much rather spend the next couple of nights in bed with Ziva.

"What are you going to do first? Talk to the director or break up with your doctor?" She wasn't my doctor, she was my assignment.

"What should I do first?" I risked, hoping he would give me answer.

"Do what you think, but if you break up with the doctor first Jen doesn't really have too much of a say any more."

"Right." I said and headed back up the stairs before turning around and coming back down. "Thanks Boss."

"I didn't do anything." He shrugged and I just laughed and climbed back up the stairs.

~**~

"Tony." Jeanne said surprised as she opened the door and saw me on the other side.

"Hey Jeanne." I said shoving my hands in my pockets.

"I thought you were busy tonight." She said with a slight attitude as she leaned against the door and watched me.

"I was." I shrugged and looked past her into her apartment. "Can I come in?"

"Sure." She said and stepped aside to let me enter. "Is something wrong, Tony?"

"Yeah, kinda." I said as I watched her walk over to the couch and we both sat down.

"You're breaking up with me." She sighed as her voice cracked and she looked away from me.

"Jeanne, I'm sorry." I tried, I really didn't want her to start crying. I hate dealing with crying women, they always make me uncomfortable. Except Ziva, when she cried in the delivery room my heart broke, part of that was also because I was scared to death over Avery's lack of crying.

"Why?" she asked setting her hands on her lap. "We've been together for a while and things were going well until a couple days ago, what happened?"

"My son was born." I said easily as I pulled out my 'undercover' cell phone and flipped it open to show her my background picture of Avery.

"Your what?" she asked horrified as she glanced the phone then back at me. "Your what?" she asked louder as she stood from the couch and looked down at me.

"Son." I said simply. "Please sit down."

"Since when do you have a kid?" she asked as she obeyed and sat back on the couch. "Are you married too?"

"No, I'm not married." I sighed as I placed the cell back in my pocket.

"You're being serious?"

"Yeah, his name's Avery." I smiled as she stared at me with her mouth ajar. "His mom's my ex."

"The woman who said lost your baby?"

"Well she never lost him, I did." I explained as I rubbed the back of my neck.

"What?"

"She left me and after you and I got together I found out she was pregnant." I looked over at Jeanne to see she was obviously waiting for more. "She offered me the opportunity to walk away and I took it."

"Ass." She whispered as she stared at me. "So that Ohio State onesie was for your son?"

"Yeah." I felt myself smile wide. "He wore it home from the hospital."

"So you're breaking up with me, to get back with her?" she asked weakly as a tear ran down her cheek.

"No, she has no interest in being with me." I sighed sadly. "Avery lives with her and-." She cut me off.

"She's making you choose between me and your son?"

"What? No." I said starting to get angry. "She wouldn't do that. She wants me to be with you, she thinks that makes me happy. She wants me to be happy, just like I want her to be happy."

"So I don't make you happy?" she accused and I buried my head in my hands trying not to yell at her. "Why were you with me so long if you weren't happy?"

"Sometimes I was." I said looking at her. "But Avery was usually on my mind and she was too."

"You love her." It wasn't a question but a statement. I nodded and she wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Love at first sight?"

"With Ziva?" I laughed but Jeanne didn't seem to find it funny. "Avery, yes. Ziva, no."

"Ziva?"

"Mmhmm." I said not exactly sure how to elaborate on Ziva considering Jeanne still doesn't know who I really am or what I do. "She's Israeli, but that's a part of college having a foreign teacher you don't understand."

"She's hard to understand?" Jeanne asked obviously confused because with both knew I wasn't multilingual.

"Oh yeah, especially when she uses idioms." I laughed but pulled myself back when seeing the Jeanne wasn't too amused. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." She said wiping more tears away as she stood from the couch and headed over to the door.

"I didn't mean to hurt you." I said as she pulled the door open and I stepped out and turned back to her.

"But you did." She said. "Congratulations on your son, Tony."

"Thanks." I said as she closed the door.

~**~

"Tony?" Abby questioned as she came down the hall at the sound of the door opening. "How'd you get in?"

"Ziva gave me a key." I said as I held the key up on my key ring. "Where's Ziva?"

"Sleeping." Abby said as she pointed to Ziva's closed door.

"Avery?" I asked as I glanced in the bassinet not seeing my son.

"Crib." Abby said crossing her arms and watching me as I walked past her into the nursery.

Avery was sound asleep on his back. His hands curled into fists one laying on his chest and the other above his head. My old, his new baby blanket lay on top him from his mid stomach down.

"Ziva says he sleeps like you." Abby whispered as she stood next to me and we both watched Avery sleep.

"Yeah." I said and turned to smile at Abby. "Except with Ziva," I started and stroked the hand that was laying on Avery's chest. "this arm would be wrapped around her." That earned me a punch to the ribs and I whimpered as I stepped from the crib and keeled over trying my damnest to be quiet. "What was that for?"

"Follow me Anthony DiNozzo." She hissed quietly as she drug me out of Avery's room by my ear.

"Abby Abby." I whined as we entered the living room and she squeezed harder before letting my go. "Ow, what was that for?"

"You sleep with her." She started and pinched my arm. "You get her pregnant." She pinched my side. "You leave her?!" she hissed and pinched my neck, hard.

"No, that's not how it happened." I squealed trying to wiggle away from her.

"Not to mention you've had some new girlfriend for a while." She added obviously ignoring my previous statement.

"Abby, please let me explain."

"Be quiet you're gonna wake up Ziva and the baby."

"Then let me go." I pleaded as I pulled at her hand. She finally let go of my neck and crossed her arms over her chest. "Thanks."

"You said you could explain?"

"We didn't just sleep together the one time." I started and her eyes went wide with anger. "No, I mean we were together, you know like a relationship."

"Oh so you were together and she told you she was pregnant and you got a new girl?" she offered.

"No!" I yelled and we both immediately fell silent waiting to hear either Avery cry or Ziva. "This summer, we were together and when Gibbs came back. She. Left. Me." I said and watched as Abby's face softened. "Okay? She ended us and I let her."

"Why?" Abby asked as she glanced back at Ziva's closed bedroom door. "Because of Gibbs and his rule?"

"Yeah, I guess." I shrugged as I sat on the couch. "She also said something about how we didn't work well together."

"That's bull." Abby said as she sat next to me on the couch. "But why did you walk away when she told you she was pregnant?"

"She told me to." I said as I played with my watch. "I was already with someone else when she told me."

"Oh Tony." Abby sighed. "What does your girlfriend think about this?"

"I never told her, until today, when I broke up with her." I couldn't help but smile seeing the smile break out across Abby's face.

"To be with Ziva?" Thankfully I didn't have to answer because of the cries coming from Avery's room.

"I got him." I said as I stood from the couch and headed towards my son's room. "Hey." I smiled as I picked the crying baby up and turned back to Abby who had followed me into the room.

"Are you scared?" Abby asked as I rocked him.

"To death." I whispered as I reached into the crib and grabbed the blanket and brought him over to the changing table to wrap him in it. I made sure his arms were free because when they weren't he was not happy.

"He's probably hungry." Ziva said from the doorway as I brought the tiny baby back into my arms.

"You should be resting." Abby scolded and Ziva glared at her. I laughed and followed Ziva back into her bedroom where she carefully laid down on her side. "Okay, I'm going to go now, call me if you need anything."

"Thank you Abby." Ziva said with a smile.

"Thanks Abs."

"No problem." She said as she left the room and we soon her the front door close.

"How are you feeling?" I asked as Ziva pulled off her shirt and put it on the other side of the bed. My eyes went wide at the sight of Ziva's engorged breast and all the blood in my body was starting to head south.

"What? It's nothing you have not seen before." She smiled as I set Avery down on the bed next to her and she arranged herself so she could feed him.

"Yeah, but it's something I haven't seen for awhile, especially not when they're this big." I smirked as I sat on the edge of her bed and did my best to keep my eyes on her face.

"I do not think your girlfriend would like the looks you are giving me." She added as she stroked Avery's cheek.

"Girlfriend no more." I smiled and glance to her scar to see it seemed to be healing nicely. "Broke up with her."

"Oh?" she questioned as she looked from Avery to me. I smiled and scooted further up on the bed so I was closer to her and Avery. "You were together for awhile."

"There's a reason for that." I said as I placed a strand of hand behind her ear.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"What do you mean?" She asked and I let my hand linger on her cheek.

"It was an assignment." I mumbled as my eyes lingered on her beautiful face before moving to meet hers. She stared at me for a while confused. "The Director asked me to get close to her to gain information on her father. It was around the time Gibbs came back."

"So this whole time," she paused to think. I saw the anger in her eyes and the tension in her voice. "You have been lying to everyone?"

"I didn't think it through and Jenny made it seem like it was a privilege to be apart of the assignment." I said softly as Avery started to fuss. His hand had gotten caught under his blanket and he wasn't happy.

"It would benefit your career, yes?" Ziva asked as she helped Avery who settled and was sucking on his fingers.

"That's what she told me." I sighed as rubbed Avery's tummy trying to soothe him to sleep as Ziva stroked his hair. When she didn't say anything I looked from the now sleeping baby to her. She was watching Avery thoughtfully as he sucked on his pointer and middle finger. "Ziva, I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?" she asked evenly as she carefully got off the bed and walked around to pick up Avery.

"I can get him." I offered and she glared at me as she brought Avery close to her chest.

"I can carry my own child." She hissed with another glare.

"I know you can." I said as I followed her into the nursery. "Can we talk about this?"

"I think you have said it all." She said softly as she placed a kiss to Avery's forehead and placed him in his crib before leading me out of the room.

"Can you just be mad at me or something?" I pleaded as she walked into the kitchen. "Give me some type of reaction."

"You want me to be mad at you?" she questioned as she got herself and myself a glass of water.

"Thanks." I said taking a sip. "I don't want you to be mad, I want you to tell me what you feel."

"Why does it matter, Tony?" she asked. "It is not like we were together and you were cheating."

"It felt like I was." I say as I took a step towards her.

"Why?" she asked not taking a step back or forward.

"We are still partners." I reminded her. I wasn't exactly sure myself why it bothered me so much to be with Jeanne. "And I was not completely honest with you and that bothers me."

"How many people know the truth?" she asked me.

"You, Gibbs, and the director." I said moving a fraction closer to her. "Except the director doesn't know I ended it with Jeanne."

"Why?" she asked as her eyes locked with mine and I couldn't help but smile at the challenging look on her face, she was going to make me work for her forgiveness, and hard.

"I didn't want to be apart of that any more." I said taking another gulp of water. "I didn't want to be with Jeanne and I don't want to spend my free time any where else but here."

"Here?" she questioned as she took the glass from my hand and set it on the counter.

"With Avery, with you." I clarified.

"You are kittened by him." Ziva smiled at me. God, she had a beautiful smile.

"Smitten, and you are too." I laughed.

"I know, he is perfect." She smiled brightly as she glanced behind me towards Avery's nursery.

"Of course he is, look who his parents are." I smirked and Ziva swatted my chest. We fell silent and I closed the space between us and risked resting my forehead against hers. "Ziva."

"What Tony?" she asked softly, her warm breath brushing across my face.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth. I'm sorry I let you believe there was someone else." I whispered as I rested my hands on her hips, careful of her scar. "Someone more important than you and Avery."

"I understand, Tony." She said and I could tell by her voice she didn't mean it.

"You don't. I know I hurt you, Zi." I sighed and nuzzled my nose against hers, still surprised by how close she was letting me get to her. "Leaving you pregnant and alone."

"I am fine." She said trying her best to convince me her words. "Girlfriend or not, do you believe things would have been different?"

"Yes." I replied without thought. "I would have been at the first sonogram, when you found out it was a boy, when he kicked you, the cravings, and mood swings."

"I did not have mood swings." She defended and I just laughed. "Tony, you are forgetting that you did not want to be a father."

"I came around." I reminded her as I moved a hand from her hip and stroked her hair. "After Gibbs and I talked-."

"You talked to Gibbs?"

"Yeah, it went, well I guess." I smiled.

"So he knows?"

"Oh yeah." I confirmed and she sighed. "I corrected his thinking that it was just one night and that I had a real girlfriend I left you for."

"I never said you left me for her." She quickly corrected.

"I know." I laughed and kissed her nose. "Abby knows too."

"What? How?"

"You told her Avery sleeps like me, I guess she figured it out." I laughed as she reflected on when she told Abby that.

"Shoot." She sighed.

"It's fine, according to Gibbs everyone knows any way."

"How do all these people know?" she asked frustrated.

"Not sure." I mumbled and pulled her body closer to mine, enjoying her warmth.

"Tony." She said seriously as she brought her hand up and rested it on my chest. "I appreciate you telling me the truth, but." She paused and stepped back to look at me.

"But what?" I asked nervous.

"I do not want to be presumptuous."

"Just say it, Ziva."

"I am not going to date you again." Um, ouch. I sighed and dropped my chin to my chest.

"I didn't ask you out." I reminded her and she laughed with a wince and placed her hand on my cheek.

"You have that look and you were being cuddly?" she questioned herself on her word choice.

"Ziva, I -." She cut me off by placing her finger over my lips and I fought the urge to lick it to gross her out.

"We do not belong together."

"We do." I confirmed taking her back into my arms. "And we have Avery to prove that."

"Just because we produced a child does not mean we belong together." She reminded me.

"You're forgetting how me made Avery." I smirked running my hands softly up and down her sides. "I would have no problem reminding you."

"I know you would not." She blushed with a yawn. "Just because we are amazing together in bed does not mean we will work."

"Why are you fighting this?" I sighed frustrated.

"Because I do not want to hurt our baby, Tony." She said her hormones getting the best of her again. "I do not want to get hurt, again."

"I'm sorry." I whispered against her forehead. "But if you didn't leave me we would still be together and wouldn't have had to deal with this Jeanne bullshit."

"So now it is my fault?" she asked stepping or rather pushing away from me.

"No, well yeah." I sighed. "You broke my heart first."

"So what, this was some type of cash back?" she growled throwing her arms in the air.

"What? No. I wouldn't do that to you." I said my voice gradually getting louder. "I also wouldn't of given us up because of Gibbs and what he would think."

"Oh, so I gave us up?"

"You broke us up."

"Maybe, Tony, I wanted you to fight for us. Because I know how much Gibbs, and what he thinks means to you, so it was up to you." She yelled at me. "So I broke us up and let you decide what was more important. Your job or us."

"You were testing me?" I growled hurt. "You coulda just told me, or even asked me."

"Your job is your life, Tony, that much is clear." She said as she brought the glasses to the sink.

"What's that suppose to mean?" I asked as I stood behind her at the sink, pressing my chest against her back. "Because you're my partner, my job is to have your back."

"Maybe I wanted to be more than your job." She said as she pushed against me and walked to her room and closed the door softly behind her.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: So I know I'm making Jenny out to be a bitch but it works for the story. And Tony may seem a little more our of character than normal and that's because Tony lately has just been an ass, minus the secret santa thing.**

**And there's a bit of a time jump, this is about 3 months after.**

Chapter 9

"Tony." Ziva said softly as she squatted next to me and gently ran her hand through my hair trying to wake me.

"What?" I groaned realizing I was sprawled out on the nursery floor in front of Avery's crib.

"You should get going if you want to shower." She said as she unknowingly continued to stroke my hair, making it very difficult for me to stay awake.

"Yeah." I mumbled making no attempt to actually get up. I wanted to pull her down next to me and sleep but I knew that would probably result in my immediate death. "You go back today?"

"Yes." She smiled and dropped her hand quickly.

"Guess I should leave." I sighed and looked at my watch to see I only had a little over an hour to get ready.

"Why are you on the floor?" she asked as she watched me struggle to get up. "Is the couch that bad?"

"No, the couch is good." I groaned as I finally stood up completely. "It's just a long walk from there to here."

"It took you five minutes to stand up." She laughed and I glared at her and then peaked into Avery's crib.

"You're going to take him to the day care by the base?" I asked as I reached down and stroked my sleeping son's spiky black hair. It, of course, was naturally spiky, I had nothing to do with it.

"Yes." She said as I stretched and saw her watching me.

"Checking me out, David?" I smirked as she rolled her eyes.

"In your dreams, DiNozzo." She laughed as she stood next to me at the crib. "He's gotten so big."

"I know." I said with a smile as we both watched Avery sleep. "You got your wish." I laughed as I saw her look at me confused. "With the black hair and green eyes."

"I did." She smiled brightly as she ran her finger over Avery's cheek.

"I guess I'll go get ready for work." I said as Avery started to stir awake. "Maybe not."

"Gibbs will kill you for being late." Ziva laughed as she scooped Avery up and brought him over to the changing table. "Right, love?" she said as she rubbed her nose lovingly against Avery's and he giggled happily.

"I'll live." I smiled as I watched her change him.

"He is so happy in the mornings." Ziva smiled as she tickled the bottom of his feet and he gave her a gummy smile. "What a beautiful smile."

"Thank you." I smirked and she swatted my arm and walked out of the room. "Hey, where are you going?"

"To get ready." She said as I followed her into her bathroom and she handed Avery to me. "I would like to be on time today."

"I'll be on time." I laughed as I brought Avery in front of the mirror and he squealed with delight and reached for his reflection. "Who's that?" I asked as I kissed his ear and he reached for my reflection as he continued to laugh. "Huh? Is that you?" he wasn't paying attention to me but instead continued to laugh and reach for Ziva's reflection as she turned to watch. "Is that Mommy?" I laughed as Avery quieted down and realized he was hungry then started crying.

"I'll feed him." Ziva said as we walked out into the kitchen and she warmed up a bottle.

I sighed as I watched Ziva move around the kitchen, also getting herself something for breakfast. I stayed over every other night but visited every night after work or most of the day on the weekend. Goodbyes were the hardest part, I hated having to hand Avery over to Ziva and walk away. I smiled as I felt Avery's hand on my face, obviously trying to get my attention.

"What?" I asked as Ziva tested the temperature of the milk. "Excited for day care?" I asked as I pressed a kiss to his forehead. Ziva laughed and stood in front of me, waiting for me to hand Avery over.

"Hungry boy." Ziva laughed as Avery happily sucked at the bottle. "Is the director still punishing you?"

"No, not after Gibbs laid into her." I said as stepped closer to her and stroked Avery's hair. "Ziva?"

"Yeah?" she asked not looking up from Avery. I took a deep breath and just stared at her before taking another step closer. She looked up confused by my pause. "Tony?"

"Nothing." I said shaking it off as Avery finished his bottle and Ziva burped him.

"What is it?" Ziva asked alarmed as she settled Avery against her chest and she looked up at me with those beautiful brown eyes.

"It's just Avery's gonna be sleeping through the night soon and," I paused to look at Avery. His green eyes were wide and hooded underneath his long black eyelashes.

"and what?" she asked obviously not following my train of thoughts.

"Will you give me a chance?" I asked randomly, expecting her to know what I was thinking.

"A chance at what, Tony?" she laughed as she placed Avery in his jumping seat thing.

"Us." I said and she backed away from me but I placed my hand on her arm and kept her close to me. "Please, Ziva, we don't have to pick up where we left off, we can start over."

"Tony." She started but fell silent and she just looked at me. Avery was babbling in the background oblivious to us. "I don't know."

"What's there to know, Ziva?" I asked as I moved my hands from her arms to rest on her hips. She narrowed her eyes at me but didn't move away or break my wrists, so that was plus. "We're good together. Avery's gonna be four months soon, and I've been here every night and we haven't fought once, and there was that kiss the first time I heard you singing to him." I stopped and she continued to just look at me, obviously thinking of what to say. "And I hate having to leave the nights I don't stay over. I hate going back to my apartment."

"Carl asked me out." Ziva stated softly, randomly, and calmly as she brought her hand to cup my cheek.

"Wait, what?" I asked shocked. Carl, what the hell was that ass doing asking out Ziva? "Carl, from human resources?"

"Yes, when I went in yesterday to talk to the director he asked me out." She explained as she dropped her hand and glanced at Avery who was babbling at us. "I do not think he knows I had your baby." I couldn't help but smirk, boosts my ego every time she says stuff like how she had my baby or how Avery looks or acts like me. "I declined."

"Yeah?" I smirked and she glared at me.

"He was pretty sad about it." She said and glanced at the clock behind me. "Shit, we have to get to work, Tony." She sighed as she pulled away from me and picked Avery up. "You still need to go home a change, I do not think Gibbs would like you showing up in your T-shirt and sweats."

"No, that'd probably get me hit." I laughed as I took Avery from her and walked towards the door. "Be good at day care." I mumbled as I cupped the back of his head and leaned him back so I could look at him properly. He laughed at me as he grabbed at my shirt. I smiled and kissed his nose and forehead before handing him back to Ziva. "See ya tonight." I said as I kissed the top of his head and he looked up at me from Ziva's arms with a pouted lip and sad eyes. He knew what goodbye was and I hated that. "We'll finish our talk?"

"Of course." Ziva nodded, and I wasn't quite sure if she was being sarcastic or not.

~**~

"Nice of you to show up, DiNozzo." Gibbs said as I rushed to my desk. He wasn't at his so I figured I could sneak in, obviously not.

"Sorry Boss." I mumbled as I put my gun in my drawer. "Wait, no, I'm not sorry, 'cause that's-."

"Shut up, DiNozzo." Gibbs said as he sat at his desk with his beloved coffee. "Just get to work."

"Where's Ziva?" I asked not seeing her at her desk.

"McGee?" Gibbs asked which I guess meant that he didn't know.

"She's with the director." McGee said.

"I'm gonna get coffee." I said as I quickly left my desk and headed for the break room. I grabbed myself a cup of coffee and got Ziva her tea. I felt like an idiot as I stood outside the director's office but I didn't have to wait long. "Hey."

"Tony." She smiled and I held the tea out to her. "Thank you." She said and took a sip, eyeing me suspiciously.

"What?" I asked with a smirk and she just shook her head at me. "What did the director want?"

"Nothing." Ziva said suddenly defensive.

"Whoa." I said and took a step closer to her. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Tony." Ziva said as she took some more of her tea and avoided looking at me.

"Ziva, are they sending you back to Israel?" I asked and heard the hitch in my voice. Nothing scared me more than losing her and Avery to Israel and her father.

"What? No. My father does not even know about Avery, well not yet." She said as her eyes finally met mine and I saw something I'd never seen before, fear.

"Come with me." I said and led her to the bathroom. I locked the door behind us after making sure we were alone. I took her tea from her and set in on the sink next to my coffee. "What's going on with you and the director?"

"It is really nothing, everything is fine." She said and kept her eyes over my shoulder on the wall.

"Stop lying to me, we're partners, we're best friends. Right?" I asked as I brought my finger under her chin and made her look at me.

"Yes, Tony, despite everything I have done to you." She started softly as she dropped her eyes again. Everything she's done to me? What the heck was she getting at?

"Everything you've done to me? Zeev, you gave me Avery, the best summer of my life-." She cut me off with a finger to my lips.

"That is not true." She said and I shook my head.

"It is, summers have always sucked. Being at home with my father from boarding school and college. You know this." I said stepping closer to her. I remember having this conversation on one of our first dates. "Just tell me what's happening. What does the director want from you?"

"Jenny and I, we were friends before I came here to NCIS. You know this, yes?" she asked and I nodded as she played with my tie. "She was the first person I told when I found out I was pregnant. I needed to know how it would effect my job, if I would be terminated."

"Okay." I said already knowing I wasn't one of the first people to find out, I figured she at least told Abby before me. "And?" When she didn't continue I cupped her cheek and forced her to look at me. "Sum it up for me, babe, just give me the jist."

"She promised she would not tell my father, if I did not tell you." Ziva said with a tight voice as she swallowed hard and looked at me. "But I had to tell you, I could not let you think there was someone else who fathered Avery."

"Yeah." I agreed as I thought about what she said. The director didn't want me to know about my child for her own personal vendetta. "I thought you told your father."

"No, he would have recalled me to Tel Aviv and probably forced me to terminate the pregnancy. He would have had no problem killing me, you, or Avery." Ziva said as her eyes started to water. I knew she got frustrated when her emotions became obvious.

"So he knows now?" I asked. I had always prayed the Eli David just stopped caring about Ziva and was indifferent when he heard of her pregnancy. Guess not.

"He will." Ziva sighed. "She told me she did not want you to know about Avery because she did not want you to hurt me or him, but really she just wanted you to stay with Jeanne until everything happened that she wanted to happen."

"And when I broke up with her she was pissed." I said and dropped my head to her shoulder. I didn't care that we weren't together and it might make her uncomfortable. Her father was going to find out about Avery now and from the fear that Ziva was showing it wasn't going to be good. "So she's going to tell him now? Just rat you out because I choose to be with you and Avery over Jeanne?"

"She did not want me to tell you in the first place." Ziva said as she nuzzled into my neck. Seeing her this terrified was terrifying me.

"I'm glad you did." I whispered against her ear and could feel her smile into my neck. I couldn't even imagine what would have happened if Ziva had told me that she was pregnant by some other man. Just the thought enraged me. "I love my little boy, Ziva, and I'm not gonna let anything happen to him or you."

"It may be out of your control." She sighed as she pulled back from me and placed her small hand on my cheek.

"I'll have a word with Madame director." I grumbled as I dropped my forehead against hers. "Zeev, I lo-." Her finger cut me off again.

"Don't say it." She pleaded, her breath warm against my face. "Please, Tony, this is already too much for me."

"You told me you wanted me to fight for you." I smirked as I kissed her cheek.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"You two, get to work." Gibbs said as he eyed us. "What the hell are you doing in here any way?"

"I swore I locked that door." I said as Ziva pulled out of our embrace and looked at Gibbs.

"Get outta here." He demanded as he held the door open for us and we both left in a hurry before he could slap us.

"Hey." I said as I grabbed her arm before she could run away. "I'm going to go have a talk with the director."

"Not today." She said softly as she placed her hand on my bicep. "I may have said some not so nice things. Let her cool down, maybe she will not tell him."

"Fine, I will wait 'till tomorrow." I said as I pushed her back up against the ugly orange wall. "And we can finish our talk from this morning tonight."

"Can we just work now?" she pleaded dropping her hand from my arm. I studied her for a moment and nodded.

"Yeah, sure." I said and let her slip past me.

"You two, what the hell?" Gibbs asked as we walked back into the squad room and he was already back at his desk.

"What do you mean, Boss?" I smirked and Gibbs threw a pen at me.

"Will not happen again Gibbs." Ziva said as she glared at me.

"What?" I laughed and she threw her pen at me. "That's not nice Ninja."

"Shut up Tony." Ziva hissed and picked up another pen and pointed at me as if it were a knife.

"Yo." Gibbs barked. "Shut up." He said as he settled his blue glare on her, then me and McGee snickered.

"Shut up McGirlScout and go get me some cookies, Thin Mints and Carmel Delights to be exact."

"For the millionth time I am not a Girl Scout my next door neighbor's daughter is one, I got them from her!" McGee screeched as his face turned red.

"What are you talking about?" Gibbs asked confused and I glanced at Ziva who also had a confused look on her face.

"Nothing, Boss." McGee said as he hung his head to look at his keyboard as he typed.

"DiNozzo, my office." Gibbs roared as he stood from his desk and headed towards the elevator. "Now."

"Haha." McGee said as I threw Gibbs and Ziva's pens at him.

"Suck it up Tony." Ziva smirked as she watched me walk to the elevator.

"Oh hush, David." I said as I meant Gibbs at the elevator and he pushed me in before stepping in himself.

"What's up?" I asked and he just glared at me.

"What is wrong with you today?" he asked.

"Nothing, I'm good." I said as I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Oh really?" he asked obviously not believing me. "You know I hate office romances."

"Yeah, but that's not the problem here." I said not sure how much I should tell Gibbs without pissing Ziva off.

"Then what is the problem? 'Cause you better fix it." Gibbs said as he took a threatening step closer to me. "Have you and Ziva been fighting?"

"Not at all." I smiled brightly as I unfolded my arms.

"You know what? I don't care. So why don't you just get it over with and tell me what's going on." He said and I sighed.

"Director David doesn't know about Avery." I grumbled as I avoided looking at Gibbs. "But he will soon and that has Ziva and I on edge a little."

"Then why is Ziva telling him?"

"She's not." I said and I watched it click for Gibbs as he released the brake. "Boss wait." I said before he could run away to the director's office.

"What?"

"She doesn't want us to talk to her today." I said as I stepped out of the elevator. "And I have dibbs."

"You have dibbs?" he laughed and I scowled at him.

"Yeah Gibbs, I have dibbs." I smiled as he just shook his head and walked away.

"Okay DiNozzo." He said as he glanced up at the catwalk before sitting at him desk.

I sat back at my desk and finally decided I should start the shit load of paperwork sitting in my in-bin. I glanced at Ziva who was watching me. She was curious, I could tell by the look in her eyes. I grinned at her and picked up my own pen and started writing up my reports. I could feel her eyes on me for a moment or so longer until she started her work. I stole glances all day and my heart leapt every time I got to see her sitting across from me again.

"Gibbs, I have to pick Avery up." She said almost nervously as she glanced at the clock on her computer. "The day-care closes at six." I watched Gibbs as he eyed the paperwork on her desk. Why Ziva had so much paperwork on her first day back I had no idea. It was probably some type of punishment from the director. "I can bring him back here, he will not be a problem."

"Okay." Gibbs said simply with a slight smile as Ziva grabbed her stuff.

"Can I go?" I asked hopefully and they both just looked at me.

"No." Gibbs said. "I think Ziva is capable of picking up Avery and bringing him back here by herself."

"Fine." I pouted.

"You are such a child." Ziva laughed as she slipped her jacket on and headed for the elevators.

"Hey, where's Ziva?" Abby asked about 15 minutes later.

"She went to pick up Avery." I smiled as I heard the elevator ding and Ziva stepped out, the baby carrier at her side.

"Perfect timing." Abby squealed as she ran to Ziva and took the carrier from her hand. "Hi Avery." Abby cooed as she set the carrier on Ziva's desk and unbuckled Avery from his carrier. I smiled as I noticed him wearing the Ohio State onesie I had gotten from him before he was born. "Hi cutie!"

"I like the outfit." I said with a smirk as I looked to Ziva who was coming around to sit at her desk.

"Aw Tony, he knows your voice." Abby said as she looked at Avery who had turned his head in my direction when I spoke.

"He's supposed to Abby." I smiled proudly as I stood from my desk and went to take Avery but Abby stepped away from me not allowing me to hold my son. "Hey." I pouted as I intentionally stuck my lower lip out.

"It's my turn. I haven't seen him in forever." Abby said as she rocked Avery gently as he started to fuss.

"But he's mine." I whined as Ziva stood from her desk and placed his OSU pacifier in his mouth and he settled as Ziva stroked the black fluff on his head that was no longer spiky. "Hey, what happened to his spikes?"

"They fell down, Tony, you only spiked it with water." She laughed as she sat at her desk. "Last night."

"He's just so cute." Abby said ignoring our conversation as she stroked Avery's cheek and he gave her a gummy smile.

"He loves women." Ziva laughed as looked at me then Abby. "Always smiling."

"Wonder where you get that from." Abby laughed as she looked at Avery then at me.

"No idea what you're talking about." I smirked as I stepped closer to Avery and he squealed as I kissed his ear. He wiggled in Abby's arms as he tried to turn his little body to face me but couldn't.

"Tony, you're making him fussy." Abby complained.

"Sit at your desk and work, DiNozzo. Let Abby play with Avery for a little while." Gibbs ordered as he entered the squad room with a smile in Avery's direction.

"But-." I started to complain but Gibbs shut me up with a look. "Fine." I sulked and walked back to my desk.

"Thank you." Abby smiled as Avery dropped his pacifier to scream and I tried to fight the triumphant smile, barely succeeding. "You always do this to me, Tony." Abby said as she tried to soothe Avery. I watched as he stiffened his little body and continued to cry.

"Sorry, Abby." Ziva said as she also watched Abby try to quiet Avery. "He likes to spend his nights with Tony."

"Are you sure he wants Tony? Maybe he just wants to be fed." Abby said as she gently rocked him.

"I know his cries." Ziva smiled from her desk as she removed the carrier and set it on the ground next to her. "He wants Tony."

"Give him to Tony, Abby." Gibbs said with a soft smile towards her.

"Fine but I'm giving him to Tony because I don't want him to cry. Not because I like Tony." She said as she walked towards me and placed Avery in my arms.

"I love you too Abs." I smiled as I settled Avery against my chest and looked up at her, giving her my best smile as my three month old nuzzled into my neck.

"It's that easy?" Abby asked as she looked over at Ziva. "Just give him to Tony and he stops?"

"When he tenses like that and cries, yes." Ziva said with a soft smile, obviously doing her best not to upset Abby. "Don't be upset Abby, he has spent every night with Tony."

"What about you?" Abby asked as she crossed her arms.

"Mornings are mine. I take him with me on my run, we eat breakfast and then nap." Ziva smiled as she looked away from Abby to Avery and I. I smiled at her as I stroked Avery's back.

"Aw, that's so cute." Abby squealed as she looked over to me without looking like she wanted to hit me.

"Ah goo." Avery complained as he looked up at me. I smiled and arranged him so I could be able to make eye contact.

"What?" I asked as I held him up in front of my face and kissed his nose. He laughed and reached for my hair. I watched his face as it scrunched and he dropped his hand obviously not liking the gel. "Did Mommy feed you?" I asked and he grinned wildly at the mention of his mother. God, I loved that grin. He cooed back at me. "Is that a yes?" I asked as I watched his green eyes move to my lips and he pinched them. "Zee-vah? Did you feed my son?" I teased as I pulled his hand from my lip.

"Of course." She said in a tight voice. I settled Avery back against my chest and looked at her confused by her tone. Her and Gibbs were both looking up to the catwalk and Abby was watching me.

"What is it?" I asked as I turned my chair to look. The director was standing up there watching us. I felt my body tense, which made Avery tense as he started to whimper and I forced myself to relax.

"You two go home." Gibbs said as he pointed to Ziva and I and started towards the stairs. "I'm serious."

"Okay." I said as I stood from my desk and Ziva put Avery's carrier back on her desk so I could buckle him in, which made him upset again but he quieted himself by sucking on his fingers. "Come on Zeev."

"Okay." She said as she slipped her coat on and picked up Avery's pacifier, which still lay in the middle of the squad room.

"Bye Avery." Abby said as she kissed his forehead. "See you guys tomorrow."

"Bye Abby, McGee." Both of us said as I took Avery's carrier off the desk and placed my hand on the small of her back as we walked towards the elevator.

"They're so cute." I heard Abby say to McGee. I smiled as we stepped into the elevator and Ziva remained close to my side.

"Stay the night?" she asked quietly as we both looked down at Avery who stopped sucking his fingers to look up at us and give us one of his brightest smiles then returned to sucking his fingers.

"Anything you want." I said flashing back to the time she said that to me as she tried to get me to lie for her.

"I never told you." She started as we stepped off the elevator and headed towards her car.

"Told me what?" I asked confused, yet hopeful.

"Remember when we were discussing Avery's last name?" she smiled as she unlocked her car and I secured Avery in the back before turning to her. "Then you gave me the blanket."

"Yeah." I said realizing how sad it was I didn't know my son's last name.

"You signed the birth certificate before I put his last name down." She said with a slight smile. "But you never asked what name I chose."

"I guess not." I said as I looked down into the car at Avery who was still happily sucking on his fingers.

"DiNozzo. I chose DiNozzo." She said as she stepped closer to me and placed a gentle kiss to my cheek. I smiled and wrapped my arm around her shoulders and hugged her tight. This thing with the director and her father really had shaken her up. "You are a great father, Tony."

"You're an amazing mom, Ziva." I whispered against her hair as she wrapped her arms around my middle. "Lets go home." I told her after awhile. She nodded against my chest and pulled away. I looked back at Avery and saw him watching us curiously. "I'll drive." I told her and due to her current behavior I was not surprised when she easily handed over the keys.

"Okay." She said and walked around to the passenger side and I closed Avery's door.

"Hey Ziva?" I asked and she opened the door looking over the roof at me. "Thank you."

"For what?" she asked confused.

"Giving our son my name." I said with a shy smile. Pride settled in my chest as I looked through the window at Avery Matteo DiNozzo who gave me his rare crooked grin as he dropped his fingers from his mouth and kicked his arms and legs happily. She smiled at me and climbed in the car.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: so this is probably out of character, but I don't really care, lol. **

Chapter Eleven

"So what do you want for dinner?" I asked as I parked her car outside her complex.

"I do not know." She said as she unbuckled her seatbelt and stepped out of the car and I did the same and pulled Avery's door open. "What do you want?"

"Grilled cheese." I said as I lifted a sleeping Avery out from his car seat careful not to wake him. "With bacon."

"I do not have bacon, Tony." She laughed as she walked around the car to where I was and took Avery's bag and we walked up to her apartment. "But I do have bread and cheese."

"Do you have tomato soup?" I asked as Avery started to stir awake.

"I think." She smiled as she unlocked the door and flipped the light on as we both kicked off our shoes and I took off Avery's Nikes that I insisted he wore. They were red, black, and white, which of course went well with his state onesie that he was wearing.

"What time is it?" I asked as Avery tugged on his ear, a sure sign he was tired.

"Almost seven." She said from the kitchen. "Why?"

"Avery's doing the ear thing." I said as I watched her pull the cheese and bread out and head to the cabinet to look for soup. "But he's usually a night owl."

"Did you just call my son an owl?" she asked seriously as she pulled out a can of Campbell's tomato soup and I smirked.

"A night owl." I repeated as I settled Avery in the crook of my arm and slowly rocked him as he let out a yawn. "He likes to be up late. You said he used to keep you up all night too when you were prego."

"He did, always kicking and moving around." She said as she put the soup on the counter and stepped in front me. I watched as she smiled and ran her finger down Avery's cheek. He yawned again and she dropped soft kiss to his forehead. "He is not used to day care though, they said he did not nap that long."

"If we put him down now, he'll be up earlier tomorrow." I said as she stroked his hair.

"We cannot keep him up though, he will just be grouchy." She said as Avery snuggled closer to my chest.

"You're right." I said as we walked to his nursery and we each kissed him before I laid him down in the crib. I smiled as I watched Ziva pull the soft blue blanket over him.

"He's beautiful." She said as she rested her arms on the railing and gazed down at him.

"He is." I agreed as I looked from my sleeping boy to her. She sighed as she ran her fingers through his hair once more, whispered something in Hebrew, and left the room.

"Think Gibbs will be able to stop the director?" she asked as she pulled out the frying pan and started dinner.

"Dunno." I said as I stood next to her and watched her lay pieces of cheese on the bread. "Hopefully."

"If she does, I do not know what will happen." She said as she kept her eyes on the dinner. "If he will be outraged or if he will even care."

"He'll care." I said and ran my hand up and down her back trying to reassure her.

"Let's not talk about that, okay?" she asked as she turned to me with a hesitant smile.

"Okay." I said and set the table. "What do you want to drink? Wine?"

"No, ice tea is fine." She said and I nodded.

"Ice tea it is." I smiled as I pulled two glasses down and filled them with ice tea then set them on the table. "Almost ready?"

"Yeah." She said as I jumped on the counter behind her. "Hungry?"

"Yeah." I said as I watched her turn from the stove and stand between my legs and wrap her arms around my neck. "You?"

"Yeah." She said and she pulled a hand back and ran it through my hair. I couldn't tell if she was teasing me or testing me.

"If you keep doing that I'm going to end up kissing you." I said as I placed my hands on her hips and drew her closer to me.

"Dinner's ready." She said as she pecked my lips softly and pulled away quickly and put the sandwiches on our plates. "What?"

"You haven't kissed me in almost a year." I said as I watched her place the plates on the table, my lips still tingling. "Well initiated a kiss, you've kissed me back the what three times we've kissed the past year?"

"Did you not want me to kiss you?" she asked with a sly smile as she sat at the dinner table.

"I always want you to." I laughed as I slid in the seat next to her.

"Then what is the problem?" She laughed as she ate her sandwich.

"Nothing." I said with a grin as I watched her for a couple moments longer before taking a bite of my own sandwich. "That was good." I said as I finished my grilled cheese and took her plate.

"I forgot your soup." She sighed as she followed me over to the sink and noticed the red and white can sitting on the counter.

"It's fine, Zee." I laughed as put the plates in the dishwasher and grabbed the frying pan to wash.

"You do not have to do dishes, Tony." She said as she wrapped her arms around my waist and settled her head between my shoulder blades. I love a cuddly Ziva.

"I know." I said as I quickly finished the frying pan and set it on a towel before turning in her arms. "What do you want to do now?"

"I want to figure us out before I have to figure my father out, and everything else." She said as she stepped away from me and took my hand and led me to her room.

"Whoa, Ziva." I said as I stopped following and she turned back to look at me confused. "I don't think sex is the answer."

"Sex? I'm not going to have sex with you." She laughed. "I just want to lay down, we can still talk like that, yes?"

"Yeah, but you don't have to seem so against the idea of having sex with me." I mumbled as we entered her bedroom.

"I am going to change." She said as she pulled out my old t-shirt and a baggy pair of pajamas bottoms.

"Okay." I said as I sat on the edge and stared at the closed bathroom door. She came out soon later and gave me a weird look as she walked around the bed and got under the covers and laid on her side. I looked back at her and stood from the bed to take my suit jacket off then laid on my stomach and looked at her.

"What?" She asked as she scooted closer and stroked my hair again.

"I didn't say anything." I laughed as I watched her face closely.

"Do you like being a father?" she asked as her hand moved through my hair and down my back, gently massaging the tension away.

"Yeah, I really do." I said seriously. "I wish some things were different though."

"Like what?" she asked as she dropped her head next to mine on the pillow and kissed my nose.

"Like this." I said as pushed her hair off her face. "Every night, I wish this was every night."

"Me too." She whispered as she snuggled deeper into the covers. "Did you have sex with her?"

"Yeah." I sighed as I looked away from Ziva and guilt settled in my chest, but her hand moved back to my hair. She obviously wanted to hear more. "After a while, yeah. It was weird. I felt like I was cheating on you and it killed. It wasn't like us. It wasn't-." I paused and looked at her. "It just wasn't us, she wasn't you. And it wasn't just the sex thing, it was everything. Everything wasn't you. I missed you."

"Did she know about Avery?"

"No, I did my best to make sure everything was separate." I said. "Until she brought up not using condoms."

"You actually had a conversation about that?" she asked confused and I laughed.

"It ended as quickly as it started." I said with a shiver from the cool night air.

"Why don't you get under the covers?"

"Because I'll fall asleep." I laughed.

"It is better than sleeping on the floor." She said and I pushed off the bed and stripped to my boxers and climbed under the covers next to her. "Better?"

"You have no idea." I smiled as I scooted as close to her as I could get and intertwined our legs as she went back to stroking my hair. "I understand why you left me and I'm sorry I didn't fight for you. I want to be together though, like a couple, a family. We can start over if you want."

"I do not want to start over." She said seriously as she ran her hand down my shoulder to my hand and squeezed. "We have already had our first date and it was perfect, I do not want to replace that."

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

"I just want to be with you." She said her voice soft and emotional. "Forget about the director and her assignment. I want it to be just me, you, and Avery."

"Okay." I said as I moved closer and kissed her gently. "You should know, that if you try to leave me again, I won't let you." I laughed as did she. "Seriously, I don't want that for Avery."

"Avery." She smiled and got lost in her thoughts.

"Ziva?" I asked and waited for her eyes to meet mine.

"What?" she asked with a yawn.

"I love you." I whispered and squeezed her hand. "Seriously."

"I know." She grinned and kissed me deeper this time as I rolled her onto her back. "I am still not having sex with you, Tony."

"I was just kissing you." I said as I kissed her again and she moaned.

"I love you too, by the way." She said shyly and blushed. "Now turn the light off."

"You turn it off." I said as I snuggled into my pillow.

"Tony." She pleaded as she rocked me.

"It's your light."

"It is also my bed and I will kick you out." She warned and I groaned and quickly flipped the light off before jumping back into the bed and that was exactly when Avery's cries filled the air. "That is the 'I want Daddy' cry."

"He does that at night, he doesn't know I'm here?" I asked as I pushed off the bed.

"That does not mean he doesn't want you still." She laughed as I slipped out of the room and into my son's room.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

I groaned as I heard Avery's cries. It was barely five and he usually didn't get up until six. Ziva stirred beside as she rolled out of bed.

"I got him." She yawned.

"Sure." I said as I rolled over and buried by face into her pillow.

"Can you watch him real quick while I get changed?" Ziva asked as she stood next to the bed and rocked Avery who was happily babbling.

"Yeah." I said as I rolled on my side and Ziva placed Avery down next to me. "You're awfully happy." I said as I kissed Avery's cheek. I arranged his little body so his head was on the pillow next to mine.

"Gah." Avery smiled as he grabbed my nose.

"Is Mommy gonna take you on her run?" I asked with a yawn as I opened my eyes to look at him. He squealed and kicked his arms and legs. "You like running this early?"

"Dlah." He answered.

"One day, you'll understand the importance of sleeping in." I laughed as I kissed his temple and inhaled his baby scent.

"We'll be back soon." Ziva said as she leaned over Avery and kissed my cheek.

"m'kay." I said as she scooped Avery from the bed.

"Get up, Tony." Ziva said about an hour later as she threw a pillow at me.

"Time?" I groaned as I flipped on my back to look at her.

"Six fifteen." Ziva said as she placed Avery on my chest. "Watch him while I shower."

"Okay." I yawned as I pulled the covers around Avery. "How was your run?" He blew a raspberry at me in response. "That good?" I laughed as I pulled the cover over his head and pulled them back quickly. He squealed and laughed hysterically.

"Tony?" Ziva called from the shower concerned. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, just playing." I smiled as I pulled the blanket over his head and pulled it back again earning another eruption of giggles. "I love you Avery." I smiled as I leaned up and kissed his forehead.

"Your turn." Ziva said as she exited the bathroom wrapped in just a towel.

"My turn for what?" I yawned as I watched her comb her wet hair. "You sure you don't want to get dried off in the bathroom?"

"Why?" Ziva smirked. "Am I bothering you, Tony?"

"Bothered is part of what I am." I groaned as I removed Avery from my chest and laid him on his back propped up against the pillow.

"What is the other part?" Ziva asked obviously confused.

"Hot and bothered." I laughed as I pushed a damp strand of hair from her face. "It's an expression."

"Oh." She laughed as she wrapped her arms around my neck and peaked over at Avery who was content to lay on the bed. "Still hot and bothered?"

"Getting worse." I said as she kissed me lightly.

"Shame." She teased as she kissed me softly again and walked to the bed to get Avery. "I'm going to feed him."

"Guess I'll get a shower than." I groaned.

Amazingly we made it to work on time. I had to bring my breakfast with me because I decided that making out with Ziva was the better option than sitting at the table while she got to play with Avery.

"Morning." Tim called as Ziva and I entered the squad room.

"Morning." Ziva smiled as she set Avery's carrier on the floor by her desk.

"Mornin' Probie." I said sitting at my desk and flipping my computer on. "Where's Gibbs?"

"Haven't seen him." McGee said and I looked to Ziva who was paying attention to the man and woman coming down the stairs from the catwalk.

"Ziva." Both directors said.

"Director, Director." Ziva said looking at Jen then looking to her father. "Is there something you needed?"

"I was hoping we could speak," he started and glanced over to me. "in private."

"Maybe another time, I have work to do." Ziva said with a hard look in her eyes.

"Officer David, please." Director Shepard said with a serious look. "We can talk in my office."

"Then let's go." Gibbs said as he came up behind them with his signature glare and a cup of coffee.

"There is no need for you to join Agent Gibbs." Jen said as Gibbs and Ziva's dad engaged in a staring contest.

"Like hell." Gibbs said and Eli laughed.

"Agent Gibbs, please, there is nothing for you to worry about." Eli said with a stupid smile. "I am just here to talk with my daughter and meet my grandson."

"Like hell." I said repeating Gibbs' words causing all four to look over at me. "You heard me."

"Agent DiNozzo, I do not really think your opinion matters." Eli said.

"And why is that?" I asked standing from my desk to join the crowd that had formed.

"It is not your concern what my daughter, my officer does with her life or her son's life." Eli said staring at me.

"Don't you mean, officer than daughter?" I growled as I stood between Gibbs and Ziva. Smiling on the inside as Ziva shifted closer to me.

"Tony." Ziva said in a low voice, almost a growl.

"Perhaps we can take this somewhere more private?" Jen offered.

"Yes, would you like to join us Agent McGee?" Eli mocked as he looked to Tim who vigorously shook his head in the negative.

"Can you watch Avery please Tim?" Ziva asked sweetly as she walked to her desk and picked up his carrier.

"Sure." Tim smiled nervously as she set the carrier down next to Tim's desk.

"He will not be trouble, he will sleep the whole time." Ziva laughed as we all headed up the stairs.

"Like his father." I heard Tim mumble.

"Watch it McGoo." I laughed and Gibbs gave me a warning look.

"So what's all this about?" Gibbs asked as Jen sat behind her desk and Eli stood next to her as we stood staring back at them.

"Your director called to inform I had a grandson." Eli said and I felt Ziva tense beside me. "I was upset you did not call to tell me yourself, Ziva."

"I guess I just forgot." Ziva said, she really had been spending too much time around me.

"And the director said his name is Avery? That is not a very good Hebrew name." Eli criticized. "Avery David, that does not sound right."

"It sounds fine, but that is not his name." Ziva said in a tight voice and Gibbs took a sip of his coffee to conceal his small smile.

"Oh? What is his name then?"

"DiNozzo. Avery Matteo DiNozzo." Ziva said with a proud smile.

"DiNozzo?" Eli asked with wide eyes. "DiNozzo as in him?" he asked pointing to me. "Him?"

"Yeah, me." I said wanting to slap Eli's hand.

"Ziva, what were you thinking?" Eli sighed. "I knew he was coming over-."

"Because you were spying on me!"

"You were spying on us?" I asked. I was genuinely disgusted by the thought of Eli or any one else spying on Ziva and I, doing anything, especially in bed.

"I was keeping an eye on my daughter." Eli said. "Unfortunately you were part of that." He said and looked to Ziva. "Ziva, how could you let this happen? To get pregnant by an American, especially someone like him."

"What or who I do with my life is not your concern." Ziva said and I couldn't help but smirk slightly.

"No, but your job is." He said and looked to Jen. "And it seems you may not be as useful as a liaison officer any more now that you are single mother."

"She's not a single mother." I clarified.

"Agent DiNozzo, please." Eli said. "Your director is concerned and so am I."

"She just got back from maternity leave yesterday." Gibbs roared surprising us all. "And all she did was sit at her desk yesterday."

"Why are you here? To recall me back to Israel?" Ziva asked.

"No, you are still under contract with NCIS for another year or so." Eli said and pulled a paper from his jacket pocket. "But after that you and your son will return to Tel Aviv, yes."

"Avery will not be going anywhere." Ziva said as she eyed the paper in Eli's hand suspiciously.

"You would leave him in America with a father that is not his?" Eli asked as he unfolded the paper and laid it out on the desk.

"What?" Gibbs, Ziva, and I asked.

"What are you talking about, you did not even know who his father was until now." Ziva said as she picked the paper up and read it several times.

"What does it say?" I asked nervously.

"That Michael Rivkin is Avery David's father."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

"What does it say?" I asked nervously.

"That Michael Rivkin is Avery David's father." Ziva said and threw the paper back towards her father.

"What?" I roared. "Who the hell is Michael Rivkin?"

"Ziva's partner." Eli said and I clenched my fists harder, I could feel my nails digging into my palms.

"No, he is not. He was my partner years ago." Ziva hissed. "Tony is my partner. Tony is my son's father!"

"Ziva, calm down." Eli said with a slight smile.

"You just gave me fake paternity papers that say Rivkin is Avery's father, I will not calm down." Ziva glared.

"Why do you want this Rivkin to be my son's father?" I growled and Eli settled his hard eyes on me.

"That is none of your concern Agent DiNozzo." He said coolly with his thick accent.

"None of my concern?" I laughed. "You're challenging MY son's paternity, damn right it's my concern."

"Agent DiNozzo." Director Sheppard warned.

"What exactly are you trying to do, Director?" Ziva seethed. "Why are you presenting me with paperwork stating Rivkin fathered Avery. Whose last name is DiNozzo, not David."

"Your liaison position is up with NCIS soon, Ziva." Eli stated and my stomach dropped at the confidence in his eyes.

"And what does that have to do with Tony being Avery's father?" Ziva asked doing her best to hide the fear that I knew was running threw her. "He was born in Washington D.C. so regardless of who you forge as his father, he is an American citizen."

"Maybe, but when you return to Israel you will not leave my grandson here." Eli said. "He will be raised in Israel."

"He will not. He will not even know you." Ziva yelled.

"And he'll be raised here, in the states." I chimed in and Ziva nodded.

"Not if Rivkin petitions for custody." Eli grinned and my heart sunk.

"HE IS NOT HIS FATHER." Ziva yelled as she took a step closer to the desk and I knew she was ready to attack so I took her hand and gently pulled her back towards me.

"What is so bad about raising your child in Israel, Ziva?"

"You!" Ziva said and I gently ran my thumb over her knuckles and smiled inwardly when she squeezed my hand. "I want Avery to grow up in America with his father, TONY, and myself."

"You need to stop raising your voice at me, Ziva." Eli said, his jaw set in frustration now.

"They're getting married." Gibbs said and the four of us gaped at him.

"What?" Jenny and Eli asked while Ziva and I exchanged a look.

"What?" I whispered as I leaned closer to Gibbs and gave him a confused look.

"Is this true? Are you marrying him?" Eli asked disgusted as he pointed to me.

"Yes." Ziva said and squeezed my hand again.

"It is illegal to get married just to gain citizenship." Jenny said with a shake in her voice.

"We have a baby together, we love each other." I said looking between the directors. "That's why we're getting married."

"Officer David?" Cynthia asked with a soft knock and a scared voice.

"Yes Cynthia?" Ziva asked sweetly.

"Agent McGee wanted me to tell you that Avery woke up and is not calming down." Cynthia said with a quick glance to everyone in the room.

"Okay, thank you." Ziva nodded and Cynthia left.

"Bring him up here." Eli instructed and Ziva tensed.

"No." I said quickly and Eli laughed.

"Do it." Gibbs said.

"Fine." Ziva said after her and Gibbs competed in a staring contest.

"You're really this bitter?" I growled at Jen as soon as the door closed behind Ziva.

"Not yet, DiNozzo." Gibbs said throwing his empty cup in the trash.

"This is Avery?" Eli asked as Ziva came back into the office with Avery cradled in her arms feeding from a bottle.

"This is Avery." Ziva confirmed her voice much softer as she looked up from our son to her father.

"He looks like you did when you were a baby." Eli offered softy as Ziva finished feeding Avery and set the bottle down on the table behind us as she handed Avery to me to burp him.

"He looks like Tony." Ziva said as she stood closer to me.

"You are not seriously considering marrying him are you?" Eli asked as I settled Avery so he could lean his head against my shoulder as he shoved his fingers in his mouth.

"No." Ziva said and my heart stopped. "I am marrying him, nothing is under consideration."

"I am guessing you learned your sarcasm from him." Eli glared and I laughed slightly, hiding it by nuzzling Avery's hair.

"So when is the wedding?" Jen asked as she stared at Gibbs.

"Soon." Gibbs said confidently. "Don't worry about it."

"Agent Gibbs, what exactly are you doing here?" Eli asked as his glare was met by Gibbs'.

"Protecting my people." Gibbs shrugged.

"There is nothing threatening to them."

"You just tried to steal my son." I said trying to keep my voice even so I didn't disturb Avery. "And you're still trying to force Ziva back to Tel Aviv."

"Ziva, if you marry this man you will be terminated from Mossad and will no longer have a job here at NCIS." Eli started. "What will you do then? Live off Agent DiNozzo's small salary? That is not enough to raise a child on."

"Tony, Avery, and I will be fine." Ziva said and Avery wrapped his wet fingers around my tie.

"That was clean you know." I whispered against his ear and he gave me a slightly higher pitched laugh.

"Something funny?" Eli questioned.

"He's four months old, everything is funny." I said as I tickled his side quickly and he squealed with delight. "See."

"I think that is enough for today, I have things I need to tend to." Eli said as he straightened his tie. "Ziva, if I do not see you again today I will see you tomorrow. We can finish our discussion then." He nodded and left.

"You two, back to work." Gibbs instructed.

"It is okay Avery stays with us for the day, yes?" Ziva asked as she leaned into me and stroked Avery's back.

"No." Jen said.

"She wasn't asking you." I cut in with the urge to pummel her, this was all her fault.

"Agent DiNozzo, you are way out of line."

"Out of line?" I asked as I handed Avery off to his mother and took a step closer to the desk, the only object separating me from Jen. "You think I'm out of line? Because I bailed on the undercover op, which was strictly for your own personal benefit at my expense, you're not only trying to destroy my life but my son's and Ziva's? And you think I'm out of line?"

"Tony." Ziva said and placed a hand on my shoulder. "Let's just go back to the squad room."

"Fine." I said as I stepped back and placed my hand on Ziva's lower back leading her to the door.

**A/N: I know it's short and maybe out of character, but it's something. **


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Tell me honestly, how surprised are you? Lol, you can thank my recurring back injury that loves ruining my summers.**

Chapter Fourteen

"Hey." I said as I pulled Ziva aside to the partially secluded part of the stairs. "Don't worry too much about him, okay?"

"Tony." Ziva laughed as she patted my cheek. "How can I not worry? My father is trying to take Avery away from us and will do everything he can to make sure I return to Mossad. At the very least he will make sure I am not at NCIS."

"Avery's not going any where." I said as I glanced at the baby who smiled back up at me. "And neither are you."

"You do not know that." She sighed as she rested her cheek on top of Avery's hair.

"Ziva, once we get married your father cannot force you to go any where." I explained and she laughed. "Why are you laughing?"

"You really think we are going to get married, Tony?" Ziva asked as she looked at me curiously.

"Uh, yeah." I said sarcastically and obviously defensive. "What other option do you see here? And, please don't give me some line about how you don't want to get married just because it's the only way to stop your father from forcing you to return to Israel. We agreed we wanted to be a family."

"We are a family." Ziva corrected as she started to bounce Avery who was becoming unhappy.

"Exactly, so let's get married." I grinned as I stepped closer to her and kissed her softly. "Because in this family, you're the odd one out."

"And why is that?" she feigned hurt but I knew she was curious.

"You're the only one whose last name isn't DiNozzo." I smiled as I took a fussy Avery into my arms.

"I am not going to take your name, Tony." Ziva laughed as she patted my cheek.

"But you'll marry me?" I asked softly as I heard someone walk down the stairs.

"Are you asking me?" she teased. "Because if you are proposing, you better not being doing it at work."

"That's fair." I laughed nervously.

"You two," Gibbs interrupted as he came down the stairs. "Get to work."

"Yes, Gibbs." Ziva said as we both walked from our spot by the stairs back to the squad room.

"I'm going to go change him." I said as I grabbed Avery's diaper bag and headed for the men's room.

"Agent DiNozzo." Eli greeted as I opened the door and he continued to wash his hands in the sink, looking at me through the mirror.

"Director David." I responded as I shifted Avery in my arms.

"Is there a reason you brought him into the mens' room?" Eli asked as he grabbed for some paper towels.

"He needs to be changed." I said trying to sound as indifferent as possible.

"That is woman's work, is it not?" He laughed as I dried off the sink and laid a blanket down before resting Avery on top of it and keeping him stable by holding my hand over his stomach so he didn't wiggle anywhere.

"Taking care of my son is far from women's work." I growled. "Maybe if you actually gave a damn about your children you would know that."

"Yes, and you care so much that is why you abandoned my pregnant daughter for another girl?" He asked then soon left the bathroom before I could respond.

"Bastard." I growled as I removed Avery's pants and diaper. "Right, Ave?"

"Ba." He responded as he happily kicked his arms and legs.

"That's what I thought." I smiled as I fastened the new diaper and dressed him. "Better?" I asked as I settled him against my chest and grabbed the diaper bag. "I bet you're hungry."

"I packed a bottle." Ziva said as we reentered the squad room. "But I'll feed him." She said as she stood from her desk and held her arms out for Avery.

"Okay." I said as I pressed a kiss to his temple and handed him over to his mother.

"Do you want me to go warm the bottle up?" I asked as I pulled it from the diaper bag.

"No, I am going to go down to Abby's and feed him." She smiled as she gently rocked Avery who was becoming agitated again. "But thank you."

"Sure." I said as she walked away towards the elevator and I returned to my desk.

"She okay?" McGee asked as I sat at my desk.

"She will be." I said as I ran my hand over my face.

"Is she going back to Israel?" he asked and I almost snapped at him to shut up but thankfully didn't.

"No." I said while attempting to focus on my paperwork.

"Hey guys." Abby smiled as she bounced off the elevator.

"Hey Abs, where's Ziva?" I asked as Abby sat at Ziva's desk.

"In the lab, I'm just giving her some privacy." Abby said as she looked at the photos, which were new to Ziva's desk. "He is easily distracted."

"I know, I'm usually not allowed to be around while he's eating." I laughed and Abby just shook her head at me. She was probably still sour from the other day when Avery cried for me instead of wanting to be in her arms.

"This is a beautiful photo." Abby gushed as she picked the frame off the desk and looked at it closer.

"Which one?" I asked and Abby turned to photo around so I could see.

It was one of my personal favorites. A black and white portrait of Ziva and Avery. Ziva was holding Avery above her, slightly angled. Their noses were touching and Avery's hands were on the side of her face as they both grinned wildly at each other.

"He's so cute." Abby said as she picked up the next photo. "When was this?"

"Um." I started as she turned the photo so I could see it. Avery was wrapped in a hooded towel made to look like Buzz Lightyear. "Last week."

"Look at his eyes." Abby gushed. "They're so big and so green."

"Abby, is there something you needed?" Gibbs asked as he sat at his desk and Abby quickly put the photo back down.

"No," Abby smiled as she grabbed another photo and rolled the chair over towards Gibbs' desk. "Look how cute." Gibbs didn't respond but just smiled at the photo then looked back up at Abby.

"He looks like Tony now, but I think he'll turn out looking more like Ziva." Abby said as she rolled back over to the desk and put the photo down. "Don't you, McGee?"

"Nope." Tim said and I laughed. "He looks more like Tony every time I see him."

"Thank you, McGoo." I smirked.

"I didn't say it was a compliment." McGee added and Gibbs and Abby laughed.

"Are you calling my baby ugly?" Ziva hissed in a teasing manner as she stood at the cubicle wall behind McGee. He damn near jumped out of his skin.

"No, not at all." McGee stuttered as Ziva walked around the wall with a now much happier Avery in her arms.

"So you agree that he is adorable?" Ziva asked as leaned against my desk.

"Yes." McGee nodded.

"So you think I'm adorable too?" I smiled as I batted my eyelashes at my probie.

"No." McGee glared as Abby continued to laugh at his reddening face.

"But you were just saying how much Avery looked like me." I said as I stood and Ziva handed Avery to me. "So you must think I'm adorable too."

"No, not really." Tim said. "Avery's part you and Ziva. The Ziva part is what makes Avery so adorable."

"You better watch it McFlirt." I glared as I picked up Avery's blanket from his carrier and wrapped it around him. "She's mine."

"Yay." Abby squealed, startling Avery. "Sorry." She said as she noticed the baby jump and start to whimper.

"He's fine." I said as I sat back down at my desk and rubbed his back.

"But when did this happen?" Abby asked. "Like, when did you two get together?"

"We got _back_ together last night." I said and Ziva turned and glared at me.

"You two go home," Gibbs said as he pointed to Ziva and I. "You back to your lab, and you back to work."

"But Gibbs." Abby whined as she stood from Ziva's desk and came over to me and reached for Avery.

"Abby, I would not-." Ziva warned but was cut off by Avery's piercing scream as Abby held him.

"Aw, Avery." Abby pouted as she tried to soothe my son. Avery was having none of it though and continued to scream, his little face turning red. "Fine, go back to your father."

"Thanks." I said as Avery curled into my chest and stopped screaming. I wrapped his blanket around him and stroked his hair knowing he'd fall asleep soon.

"I'm starting to think he doesn't like me." Abby sighed as she continued to watch us.

"You just have bad timing." Ziva smiled as she gathered hers and Avery's things.

"I'm pretty sure he just doesn't like you." McGee laughed and Abby punched his arm.

"Shut up."

"DiNozzo, get outta here before you cause any more trouble." Gibbs said with a hint of a smile.

"Sure thing, Boss." I said as I buckled Avery into his carrier and he started to scream again.

"He really hates this thing." I said as I followed Ziva to the elevator.

"It is our fault." She smiled as she tried to soothe the unhappy baby.

"How is that?" I asked as she searched through the diaper bag and pulled out his pacifier.

"We always hold him." She smiled and rested her head against my arm as she put the pacifier in his mouth but he spit it back out and continued to scream.

"True." I smiled as I wrapped my free arm around her shoulders and hugged her close to me as the elevator opened and we stepped into the parking garage. "That's not a bad thing."

"Only when he screams like this." Ziva sighed as she opened the car door for me and I buckled his carrier in.

"Avery." I said as Ziva walked around to get in the passenger seat. "Avery." I repeated his name as he reached his arms out for me. "Calm down." I sighed as he continued to cry. "10 more minutes at most." But he didn't understand and continued to scream. "Okay, then." I said and placed a kiss to his red forehead and hopped in drivers seat.

"He is going to scream the whole way." Ziva reminded me. "He hates the car."

"I thought babies loved car rides."

"Not our baby."


End file.
